Lost & Found

The tale of an introspective girl

Tears welled in Emma's eyes immediately, trying to convince herself that everything was going to be okay. She had a man in her life who loved her deeply, who she felt the same way about - a love that created a life together. How could that be a mistake?

Emma sat down on the bench near the tree for a few long moments with Lucy in her stroller by her side. The days had started warming little by little until the snow was nearly all melted away, leaving a dreary gray landscape. But there was still a nip in the air and Emma knew she needed to get Lucy back home.

"It'll be fine. Right, Lucy?" Emma asked her daughter who stared up at her from her stroller.

"Yeah. You're right. I've got this," Emma said with a smile, causing Lucy to smile as well.

"We got this, girl," Emma chuckled as she stood up and navigated the stroller out of the park and back home where she was sure her mother awaited with questions.

"Would you like some tea, honey?" Her mother asked as she sat on the bench in the foyer, taking Lucy's snowsuit off of her.

"Sure, Mom," she said with a small smile.

"I'll put the kettle on," she said, disappearing into the kitchen.

When she saw Lucy's little lip start to quiver and her face scrunch up with displeasure, Emma began cooing at her to try to stop a meltdown before it started. But it was of no use. Soon Lucy was wailing her little heart out as Emma stood up, bouncing her in her arms.

"You're probably hungry aren't you? Need a nap, huh?" Emma cooed, patting the infant's bottom as she walked toward the kitchen to find her mom already preparing a bottle for the baby just as the kettle began hissing.

"I thought she might be hungry," her mom told her as she shook up the bottle before handing it to Emma.

"Look at that. Look, Lucy. Your grammy knows you so well," Emma cooed as she cradled the baby in her arms, bringing the nipple up to her mouth.

"Why don't you go sit down and I'll bring the tea to you," her mom suggested.

"Okay. Thank you," Emma said, giving her mom a soft smile.

She walked out of the kitchen and into the living room before sitting down in her father's favorite chair. It wasn't long before Lucy fell asleep in her arms and her mom came into the room carrying two tea cups.

"It's here when you're ready," her mom said, setting her cup on the table that sat next to the chair.

"Thanks, Mom."

"So..." She began as she sat down on the couch, crossing her legs as she dipped the tea bag in and out of her mug.

Emma knew immediately she was going to bring up the news she received at the doctor's office, so she took a preemptive cleansing breath to try to rid some of the anxiety she was feeling.

"Would you like to talk about what's going on?" Her mom asked carefully.

"Um... I... I don't know," she said quietly, looking down at her sleeping daughter in her arms.

How was she pregnant with another little one so soon? How did her one-night-stand with Aiden create this? Well, she knew how it happened. But the fact that the two of them only had sex the one time really messed with her head.

"Have you two been sleeping with each other... all this time?" Her mom asked in a calm, caring tone.

"No," Emma said quietly as she minutely shook her head.

"Just the one time?"

"Mm-hmm."

"Are you going to tell him?"

"Of course I'm going to tell him, Mom. Why wouldn't I tell him?" She asked, her eyes shooting up to look at her. She honestly didn't mean for it to sound as bitchy as it did coming out, but her stress level was through the roof.

"I'm sorry," her mom apologized.

"No. I'm sorry," Emma said with a huff. Her mind felt frazzled, along with every nerve in her body.

"I need to tell him. I love him," she admitted, giving her mom a soft smile.

"Oh, Emma," her mom cooed, bringing her hand up to her chest, looking so entirely pleased.

"This is a good thing, Emma. Remember that. This baby is a blessing," her mom reminded her.

"I know," Emma sighed, hoping Aiden would see it that way.

She had no idea how he would react. He was still grieving his wife and she didn't know how the news that he was going to be a father again would affect his mental health. She hoped everything would turn out okay.

...

Aiden picked Emma up for their very last night of grief counseling. She wasn't quite sure she felt any different about her grief after five months in therapy. It still haunted her on a daily basis. She would mourn Patrick's death until the day she died. But in all honesty, she knew she was walking away with a little more wisdom about coping mechanisms and ways to promote her healing in the future. And her biggest take away from the meetings - Aiden Hawthorne. And now, the baby in her belly. A baby she knew she needed to tell Aiden about before too much time had passed.

As Aiden drove them to the familiar church, her insides were twisting painfully with anxiety knowing this big secret was looming over the two of them. The situation was a delicate one, so she didn't want to just blurt it out. Aiden's own grief was still ever-present, so she didn't know how he would take the news. Scarlett was still a very painful subject for him, though he was finally opening up to her about his life with his late wife.

She silently wondered if the news of their unborn child would set him on a spiral of despair, or maybe something akin to what she felt in the wake of the news - stunned calmness mixed with a bit of sorrow over the fact that she was moving on with her life while Patrick would never be able to. Or on the other hand, he could truly surprise her and be completely thrilled over the situation.

"You're quiet tonight," Aiden commented as he pulled into the parking lot.

"Um. Just thinking about this being our last night... you know... here," she said, looking out the window at the church.

"It's a bit hard to believe, isn't it? I've been coming here for six months. I never thought I'd make it more than a month," Aiden told her.

"Oh. I guess I never asked how long you were going to the meetings before I came along," Emma said, feeling a bit surprised, even though it really wasn't that surprising.

Her mind then cut to the fact that Aiden wanted to leave group therapy after a month, but instead he continued going. And then she thought about how she began going to the meetings around that time. She ended up giving him a reason to stay. Her skin tingled with goosebumps as she looked over at him.

"What?"

"Can we talk after the meeting tonight?" She asked him, knowing she couldn't hold off telling him about the baby any longer. The night would not end without him knowing he would be a father again.

"Of course," he said with a nod, his face looking slightly aghast. But she understood the reason for his alarmed expression. Hearing the words 'can we talk?' was always a source of anxiety in any relationship, let alone a new-ish one with two people that had so much emotional baggage.

"Okay," she said as a small smile found her lips.

"Okay," he said, smirking back at her, looking a bit relieved.