Me, Love, & Secrets

It's Already Done

"He moved to New York after my parents told him that he wasn't right for me. I was devastated. I didn't want him to leave, but my parents were adamant on their opinions. You and your brother were only five. I thought you would remember them, but there was an accident a year later. You were hospitalized for a while. After that...you weren't the same girl I'd been raising. Your father called to check up on you, but you wouldn't speak to him. It was like your memories of him had never existed."

"And you never thought telling me was an option?"

"How could I? I was married to James by the time the doctors cleared you to go back home. Just a few weeks before clearing you to go back to school. Even then, I had to get you caught up with the other students and have your put in the right grade. It was too much and you loved James like he was your father. I didn't think he'd turn on us like that. Your father sent gifts and birthday cards. I never told you they were from him. You started to assume that he was some guy I knew. One you'd never meet."

I sighed and stared at the black screen of the TV. It's weird how I had to almost die to find out that most of my life had been a lie. I could be living a good life, but my grandparents had to ruin it. It's not like they ever came to visit anyway. They always stayed away like I was a disease. One they could never get rid of. All they do is hate people who aren't from their country. No one can foresee where they're going to be born. Or what family they're going to be born into.

"If it makes you feel any better, he chose your middle name. He said it would always be a reminder that you're his first and only daughter." Mom smiled. "It means "mine". I never quite agreed with it, but he was adamant on making it official."

At least there was something I got from him besides my skin color.

"I like that you want to meet him, but what's done is done. I'm sure he's too busy now to set up a date with you," Mom said.

"Why would you say that?" I asked.

"I shouldn't be telling you this, but he'll probably tell you anyway." Mom shifted on the couch. "I can't say much about it, but he was going to school for business and some other crap no normal person would go to school for. I found out on my own he was planning to work for the government. He's been on some case ever since he left."

"That's all you know? Do you know what governmental position he has now?"

"I wouldn't know, because he never actually told me. He just said that we would be protected from any enemies he made and they would never know we existed. I'm sorry I couldn't protect you from James. Neither of us saw that coming."

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Isabella and Samantha sat in front of me with cups of tea in their hands. I was silent, sitting across from them and trying to pretend what I'd just told them wasn't a big deal. It isn't a big deal. I don't think it is anyway.

"He's wanting to meet you tomorrow? Why didn't you tell us earlier?" Samantha demanded.

"...Because, I didn't think you'd care," I muttered. "Plus, it all happened last night. Who says he'll actually show up?"

"Me. I say he will, because he will. He hasn't seen you for thirteen years and he suggested you guys meet up? I say he's more than happy to know you called."

"What if he doesn't show up?"

Isabella rolled her eyes. "You don't want him to show up, but, deep down inside, you're hoping he will. Believe me, I've been in your position."

"You've known your father all your life."

"So? We never had a good relationship, Ruby. He and I didn't want to meet, but at some point I changed my mind."

They were really making this hard for me. I was trying to look forward to this meeting. Maybe he would bring my brother with him. But, what if my brother doesn't want to meet me? I mean, he probably has a reputation to uphold. Maybe he has a family and he doesn't want to leave them behind. That still leaves my father. What if he isn't who I think he is? What if he just wants to meet with me to make it seem like he cares about me?

"Guys," I started. "I'm going to focus on the good of this meeting. Mom told me he was kind of forced to leave her. Even if that isn't the case, I still want to get to know him. I want to meet him and see what he has to say about it."

"What about you brother?" Isabella asked. "Sooner or later, he's going to want to meet you, too. What are you going to do about that?"

"I'll set up a date like I did with my father. It's not that hard."

"It's as if he has his own life." Sam set her cup down. "I don't want you making any mistakes like you did over the past couple of years. We're just worried about you, Ruby. If your father doesn't turn out to be the handsome, caring guy your mom knew...I don't know how to help you."

Of course.

"I'll be fine. It's not like he's some hardened criminal. I'm old enough to not get too attached before he actually says he cares about me."

"He could be a criminal."

"Stop looking at the bad side, please. I'm trying to figure all of this out while I can." I pulled out my phone after feeling a faint buzz in my pocket. "How's Jade, by the way?"

Samantha took a sip of her tea. "She's fine. Why do you ask?"

"I haven't spoken to her in so long. The last time I saw her, she was moving to Santa Barbara."

"Ah, no one has. Except for mom. She told me she was planning to visit for Christmas."

Of course, no one has. Jade disappeared on us when she finished college. There wasn't much we could do about that. The last thing she said to us had me wondering if she even wanted to be part of our friend group anymore. I didn't really protest about it, but it seemed to me that Samantha and Isabella were sour about her not calling them before she packed up and left.

"Anyway, he wants to meet in the evening," I said. "I have work and school in the morning, so it's convenient for both of us. Wish me luck."

"You don't need luck, babe," Isabella muttered. "Get home safely."

"Call me when you get home." Samantha blew me a kiss.

Yeah, if I don't forget.