the sink hole of loving you //mattheo riddle

Chapter 14

The next day, Mattheo is distant. He is unusually quiet, and is constantly zoning out. Even though he is off in his own world most of the day, he always has his hands on me. On my thigh, on my back, or holding my own hand. I try not to press him, by talking way more than I usually do, about random things, while he gives the occasional nod, or grunt. He's done this before, but I never knew what caused it. It usually lasts a day or two, before he warms back up, and after a week he is back to his normal self. I kinda hope this time it doesn't take a week. "Can we go back to your dorm?" Mattheo asks after we finish all of our classes for the day. "Sure" I answer, and we start on our way to my dorm. When we get there mattheo walks in and sits down on the edge of my bed with his head in his hands. I walk over and crouch in front of him. "I'm sorry," he says. "Why are you sorry?" He looks up at me, his eyes red, and filled up with tears. "Because I'm a burden. I've been MIA and clingy all day, and I don't want to put that pressure on you." "hey!" I say. "Remember what I said last night? It's okay. Everyone has bad days, and I want you on your bad days and your good days okay?" he nods. "Now talk to me. What's on your mind?" I ask. "The dream," I nod. "I just, I can't get it out of my head. He stands up and begins pacing the room. ''What was the dream about?" I ask standing up. "You" he replies. Me? "My mom broke out of Azkaban." "What?" I ask confused. "Two days ago. She's out" he says. "Is that what you're so upset about?" I ask. "Yes," he answers. "And my dream" "the dream that was about me?" I ask still confused. "yeah," he says. "And my deranged parents." he pauses. "It was about what would happen if he came back. Or she came back. And, look at that she's back." he laughs. "What if she seeks me out?" he asks, spinning around to look at me. "What does that mean for the people I care about? And,- and I'm not even that worried about anyone, because there isn't really anyone I care that much about, but-" he pauses again. "What about you?" he asks in a small voice. "Mattheo-" I start. "What am I gonna do if you get hurt? What am I gonna do if she takes you for leverage?" he begins pacing the room again. "Is that what your dream was about?" I ask. "He was gonna kill you. He took you, and wouldn't let you go unless I did what he said, but even after that he decided that you made me weak, and-" his voice breaks. "It could happen. Neither of us believes that he's really gone, and now that my mom is out-. he stops. "I can't let you get hurt because of me. I can't" he says with a pained expression. "I'm not going to get hurt mattheo" I say walking towards him. "You don't know that" he answers, shaking his head, while tears stream down his face. "You're right," I say, "I don't know that. But I'm not going to leave you just because I could get hurt. I know the risks I always have. But I don't care. I'm a smart witch, I'm not an idiot, I know how to take care of myself, and I don't want you to worry about me. Please. You have enough hurt and worry in your life. Take me out of that." "You don't understand," he answers. "If he puts me in that position, and you get hurt, I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I can't watch you get hurt Claire. I'm sorry, but I just can't live with that." "Mattheo" I say, hoping he isn't hinting at what I think he is. "It's for the best," he whispers. "No. Please no." I'm crying now too. " I'm sorry" he starts walking to the door. "No," I plead. "Don't leave. Please don't leave." I walk towards him. He looks at me with a pained expression on his face. "I'm sorry," and with that he opens the door and leaves. "No, no, no, no, NO" I yell while sobbing. My legs give out and I fall to the floor. "Why? no. no this isn't- no-  '' ''This is unhealthy" a voice says. I look up to see the devil herself, bellatrix lestrange, mattheo's mom standing in front of me in my dorm. What? "I'm dreaming" I think out loud, "This isn't real." "Oh honey, you wish you were dreaming." she says, smiling a sick smile, revealing broken and missing teeth. "Draco, grab her wand" Draco steps out from behind her and walks towards me, taking my wand from the inside of my uniform. "You'll be able to hear your screams from a mile away" he whispers in my ear, running his finger down my cheekbone. I shiver. "Stupefy" he whispers. And that is the last thing I remember, before everything goes haywire.