Sarah Paulson headcanons!!

(request) Baking with the Oceans 8 characters

hi! this is mallory! i'm not as good as evie when it comes to introductions. but, i hope you enjoy :D

debbie
• debbie would be AWFUL at baking
• she would put salt instead of sugar in the cake mixture
• debbie would pick up the flour and pour it over you instead of putting it in the cake
• she would put her hands in the flour and smack your ass with it
• "DEBBIE!" you'd shout
• once you'd finally made the cake batter, she would scoop it out and put it on your face
• "you have something on your face babe, let me just" she would say
• she would lick it off your face and smirk
•  "debbie i swear to god, behave" you'd giggle
• you would end up making the cake
• she would distract you and you'd end up burning the cake anyway so all your effort would go to waste

lou
• lou would be so immature
• food fights, she would throw the ingredients at you and you'd end up making a mess of the kitchen
• the kitchen would probably burn down at some point because she would get so into the food fight, she would forget the oven was on
• "shit! baby! the ovens on!" she would yell when the smoke alarm would go off
• you'd roll your eyes so much while baking with lou
• "hey! i have an idea, let's put vodka in the cake mix!"
• "no, lou, we're not putting anything alcoholic in." you'd laugh at her
• "you're boring." she would cross her arms
• "no, i'm just sensible"
• she would grab a handful of flour and throw it at you for being too sensible
• there would never be a cake because lou would waste all of the ingredients by throwing them at you

tammy
• tammy would love baking, it would be you who was bad at it
• "honey, stop eating the cake mixture!" she would yell at you with a laugh
• you wouldn't listen to her so she would walk over and pick you up, carrying you to the other side of the kitchen
• "you're no fun, tam" you'd pout
• she would just kiss you and carry on with the cake
• she would give you the bowl and spoon to clean
• you'd smirk and sit on the kitchen counter to lick the spoon and the bowl
• "honey! get down off there!" she would yell
• such a mom, she would make sure you wouldn't go near the oven incase you burnt yourself
• you would be so distracting
• "tammyyyyy!" you'd whine
• "yes sweetie!"
• "can i have a kiss?" you would smirk
• she would sigh and walk over to kiss you and then she would leave you alone again to carry on with the cake
• it would all be worth it though because tammy's baking would be amazing and the cake would taste great

rose
• she would LOVE baking
• you would be getting distracted and get bored
• she would feed you bits of the cake mix before putting it in the oven
• when it would come out, she would decorate it
• LOTS of sprinkles
• the cake would look really really pretty
• she would definitely use pink icing and decorate it with edible flowers and whatever sprinkles she could get her hands on to make it look extra pretty
• "do you like it sweetheart?" she would smile proudly
• "very nice rose" you'd laugh at her cuteness

nineball
• she would definitely try and get you to put weed into the cakes
• "let's put weed in the cakes!" she would say, really over enthusiastically
• "no, we're not making edibles" you'd reply with a huff
• "boring" she would say, rolling her eyes and walking away
• you'd end up making the cake yourself (without weed)
• she would order cakes from a shop because your cake would take too long to bake and she would get impatient
• she would end up with cakes that had weed in them

daphne
• "i'm not helping you, i'm standing here, you can bake the cake, my nails will get ruined"
• you'd roll your eyes but end up doing it for her anyway
• she would beg you to make the cake pretty
• "can you make my cake pretty, like me?"
• this comment would make you laugh
• you'd make the cake with sparkly icing and she would really like it
• she wouldn't thank you though because that's not what daphne does, she would just eat the cake without saying thank you to you for baking it

constance
• CHAOS. absolute chaos
• you wouldn't end up making a cake because you'd both be throwing the food at each other
• both of you would end up eating the mixture
• it wouldn't even make it into the oven because constance would convince you to eat it with her before it went in
• you'd end up ordering take out because she would  be hungry and obviously, the cake mix would have been eaten
• "there's flour all over the floor, how are we gonna clean this up?" you would ask
• "just leave it, someone else can clean it." she would comment and walk out of the kitchen

amita
• she would be amazing at baking
• you would be causing chaos and she would shout at you
• "stop messing around" she would say
• you'd just laugh and carry on doing stupid things
• the cakes would look very pretty
• instead of making a big cake, she would make little fairy cakes and you would end up decorating one half, while she would decorate the other half
• yours would be messy with icing and sprinkles everywhere, while hers would be really pretty and neat

hey :) thank you for reading! <3
leave any requests that you have in the comments or message evie on twitter @ev1eblanchett !!
-mallory :D