Psychopathy

Chapter 9- Remembrance Of Things Past

Isabel was tired. So very tired. And when she closed her eyes to sleep, it was with the hope that she'd never open them again.

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"I'm aware that it can be hard to keep objectivity when the victim in a case is one of our own. But we have to treat this just like any other case. Look through the evidence, build the profile, and find the Unsub. Still, I know that the last hour has been... difficult, to say the least. So, if anyone would like to take five minutes to step out and collect themselves before we continue, I invite you to do so now."

At Hotch's words, Akilah looked across the table to see Reid put his head down, unable to meet anyone's eye. True, Hotch hadn't called him out by name, but it didn't take a genius to know that the words had been spoken with Reid in mind. It certainly didn't help that at the words "collect themselves", everyone had quickly glanced towards him, even if only subconsciously. It was expected that Reid would be taking Hotch up on the offer.

But in a way, Reid already had taken his five minutes- in fact, he had taken nearly a half-hour.

In the silence after he had shut down the livestream, all Akilah could think about was Reid sitting at Morgan's kitchen table, professing to her that he had feelings for Ciara. All she could think about was him softly telling her what his promise to her was and how desperately he wanted to keep it. And so it had been her that had approached first to try and comfort him. When he'd stormed off, she'd wanted to go after him. But Morgan offered to go talk to him, and Akilah had backed off. Morgan knew Reid better than she probably ever would. When they had returned, he was collected and as ready as he could be for whatever came next.

Still, though, to say the last hour was difficult was an understatement. She had already spent the weekend endlessly pacing back and forth, wondering if Ciara was even alive. When Garcia had come and told them about the livestream, and therefore proof of Ciara's life, she had felt a glimmer of hope she hadn't let herself feel that entire weekend. But that was before she saw the bruises. Before she saw the scars. Before Ciara was raped.

When those screams started, it took her back to a time in her life she'd rather not think about. For a second, all she could see was a seemingly abandoned warehouse. All she could see was a burlap sack over her head and tunnels that seemed endless. For a split second, Ciara's screams became the screams of a twelve-year-old girl put through way more than such a young body was meant to handle. For a second, Ciara's rape became her own.

But even after it was over, it didn't become any easier. It just became a different kind of difficult.  Akilah's heart had broken when Ciara had been left alone and had immediately asked for Reid. Oh, but the broken heart hadn't been for herself- but for Reid and Ciara, who clearly needed each other, but were unable to talk. That had to have been torture for him- hearing Ciara call for him, and not even being able to tell her that his silence was through no choice of his own.

It was then that Hotch had decided that they should stop watching and start working. There was nothing more they could do crowded inside Garcia's office, and so they left the technical analyst to do her job and went to do theirs. As they filed in and took their places around the table, trying desperately to ignore the empty seat that should've been Ciara's, they found that Garcia had already connected, and it was then that Hotch had given his little pep talk.

Akilah wondered briefly if she should take the five minutes, but thought better of it. She didn't need it. What she needed was to get to the bottom of this and find Ciara. She needed her girl genius back. It seemed that everyone else had the same opinion, and after a few moments of silence, Hotch had nodded, saying that it was time to get to work.