I Love My Brother's Best Friend

Goodbye Love

As I drove tears blurred my eyes. I had to get out of there, I can't take it. I can't be there for her. Which is fucking stupid because she cared for me even in my worse. All the nights I got stupid drunk and she held me as I cried about this very night.

As I pulled up at Dave's I locked my keys in my car and headed inside. I clicked my fingers twice and they immediately knew what I wanted.

After about 5 shots I started to feel a buzz. Everything was becoming numb, it felt good but the guilt tugged at me. I pushed it past as I ordered another round. A blonde came and sat beside me. She ordered the same thing and flashed me a smile.

I nodded as I chugged down three at a time, she chuckled. "Woah mister I think you've beat me." she said as I raised my eyebrow.

"Who are you?" I said as I stared. "I'm Maria, I just thought you were cute and you looked lonely." she said as I shook my head.

"I'm happily fucking married to the best girl in the world. She's dying and your fucking hitting on me. What does that say about girls like you today?" I said as I threw a few bucks down.

"Are you calling me a slut?" she yelled after me. I turned around and replied.
"I'm saying you don't know me and if the shoe fits baby, it fits." I said as she sat there star struck and I walked out. I went to my car to find the door locked. Fuck. I forgot I was going to get stupid drunk and I locked my keys in, so I wouldn't kill myself later.

I'll call a taxi. I pulled out my phone as Ashton pulled up at the curb. I groaned softly. "Dude I'm fine." I said as he shook his head. "I know you Alex, your not fine. Your wife as a terminal disease you'll never be fine. She's dying and there's no guarantee she'll make it." he said as I raised my eyebrow.

"Are you trying to make me happy, if so you really suck at it!" I said as he shook his head. "No I'm telling you to get your act together. You can do that all alone, I understand she's your rock, but you can fix this without her." he said as I frowned.

"Don't become all serious dude, just because I'm at my worse doesn't mean I've lost it." I said as I frowned.
"She's awake, she's awake and your stupid drunk......do you still think you haven't lost it?" he said as I felt the guilt tug again harder.

"She's seriously awake, we have to go!" I said as I grabbed his keys. He had a strong grip. "Your not going like this, your going to sleep this off and you can see her in the morning." he said as I approached him.

"She's my wife and I want to fucking see her now." I said as I saw the sympathy in his eyes. "Who are you Alex, tell me. You know Liz would never want to see you like this, your going home. I know she's your wife but she'll wake back up and you'll be by her side tomorrow and hopefully this "you" is long gone." he said as he pushed me in the car. I grunted and a tear fell out my eye.

He's right....who the fuck have I become.
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The Morning After:
I had taken a shower and changed my clothes Ashton had just came and gotten me. I couldn't stop moving, I was so anxious to hold my baby girl.

As soon as we pulled up I dashed through the double doors knocking over a women's cart. I apologized as Ashton came up and helped her. I kept running and I rounded the corner to see Liz laying there. The color was back in her face. She was laughing with Riley as though everything was okay, that made my heart warm.

I walked in slowly as she smiled. I walked over and pulled her close. I smelt her and I instantly relaxed. I grabbed her and pulled her face close to mine.

"I love you." I said as she smiled.
"Alex baby I haven't died." she said as I smiled wearily. "I know, but I thought for sure my baby girl was gone." I said as she pushed me slightly with a chuckle.

"Gee thanks babe, I thought I was strong and sexy as-" she said as I stopped her from finishing. Riley chuckled as I blushed. "I know baby, I just missed your cute ass so much." I said as she tried moving and I stopped her.

"Do that one more time and I'm kicking you out." she said with a smile hanging from her pink lips. I smirked.

"Yes mam." I said as she finished talking to Riley. They joked as I sat back and watched her closely. My Liz was back and better than ever it seemed. I could still see the sleepiness in her eyes as Riley kissed her cheek and left.

"You look sleepy." I said as I smiled sweetly. "Well I'm not, I want to talk." she said lazily as I sat down beside her and grabbed her hand. "Anything baby, shoot." I said as she sighed. "I know I have cancer and I know you went crazy when I wasn't awake." she said as my heart sunk.

"Baby I'm sorry, I just couldn't take it." I said as she stroked my head. "Baby I could possibly die and I'm not risking you doing something stupid, so if it's been more than a week of me "sleeping" promise me you'll cut....it off." she said as I shook my head no vigourously.

"No baby I'll wait as long as it takes. I'm not risking you waking up and I'd have just cut it off." I said as she smiled.

"Baby it's what I want, it's my decision. You don't get it, you expect me to make your decisions but I need you to learn how to live without me." she said as a tear fell down her cheek.

"No I won't. I love you and I can't live without you. I can learn to live without you, with you by my side." I said as she cried harder.

"See baby look, I did that I made you dependent on me. Baby I'll always be in her your heart. My love for you will never die." she said as I cried harder.

"I can't promise you, you are more than my wife. You're my fucking best friend. My soulmate. I know I'm dependent on you, but that's only because you make me, me." I said as she smiled and a few tears fell down her face.

"I'll miss you baby." she said as I hung my head. "You are not gone yet, don't tell me goodbye." I said as she grabbed my chin.

"Alex Ryan Hill, I'll love you like there's no fucking tomorrow. You think your my best friend and soulmate well your not. You're me and I'm you, we are one in the same. You are more than just my lover, your my love. I'll never tell you goodbye. That word won't be spoken, ever. I'll always be here." she said as I climbed in her bed beside her. I clung right to her frail body.

I'll never say goodbye either, ever.
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Ugh I know it's probably short to some, but it's a update!!!!

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