Welcome to Welton

Chapter Two

It's nearing eighty thirty. The sun is more gold than bright. Neil sits at the window, his knees pressed into his chest. He watches through the glass, paying no mind to the book he's been holding.

His skin glows orange. His eyes are honey in this lighting. Everything about him draws me in. I examine every inch of him, from the mole on his chin to the straight line of his nose. I'm not sure why my chest clenches at the site

Even when I close my eyes, he's there. Just as clear and perfect. I can't help but to imagine what he feels like. His hair and skin. His cheekbones underneath my touch. Or how his hand would fit with mine.

I pull away from him. I feel cold, but I think I'm just anxious. My teeth clench, my heart quickens its pace. It's the type of chill that leaves you aching and sore. I try and relax, leaning my head back and forcing my eyes shut. Nothing helps. I'm tense.

"Are you alright?" 

I nearly jump when hearing his voice. I actually do jump when opening my eyes.

Neil is squatting by my bed, eyes locked with mine. I watch as his hand grabs for my shoulder. Then I contemplate if I should actually let him.

In the end, of course I do.

My lips feel too dry. My stomach swirls with guilt. If my heart doesn't stop racing, I think it might explode. Can he feel it beating?

"What?"

"Are you alright?" He looks even more worried than he did just two seconds ago.

"Y-yeah of course."

He seems unconvinced. "You look pale."

And he looks perfect.

"I just need to go to the bathroom." I don't actually, but it's the first excuse I think of to shrug him off. Before I know it, I'm halfway down the hall. Every step away from him leaves me feeling better.

I wonder if it's too late to ask for a new roommate. I'm not sure I can handle an entire school year of this. It's been a few days and I'm already nauseated.

The bathroom here is cleaner than the one at my other school. In fact, it's cleaner than any men's restroom I've ever been in. The toilets are spotless and the sinks haven't rusted. There's no random piss stain on the floor. And it smells of pina colada air freshener.

I make my way to the first stall. I lean against the locked door. Where does this school want us to have our emotional breakdowns if we are forced to share a room? The bathroom isn't exactly the best place to collapse on the floor and sob for hours. They should invest in a meltdown room.

I don't know how much time goes by before another set of footsteps appear. I wait for them to go before leaving myself. Part of me hopes Neil is gone. Maybe he'll be hanging with friends.

Another part wants to hear his voice. To throw secret glances his way. It's all I've done since getting here. He hasn't left my mind since day one.

I don't know what it means, if it means anything at all. But I do know that his laugh is contagious. And that women swoon for his dimples.

I know that I think of him more than a roommate should. I know that no amount of denying will make my cheeks flush less when catching him stare. I know that with Neil around, I'm screwed.

Neil is in his bed, glasses on, book in hand. He's actually reading this time. His expression changes with every other word. Until the door creaks shut. Then his face goes still.

Very carefully, Neil looks up. His eyes stop before meeting with mine. I wonder if he'll look away. It would be for the best.

Just as the thought leaves my head, Neil's eyes flick up to mine. We watch one another, him from his bed and me from the doorway. He looks at me differently than anyone else ever has. I can't tell if it's pity or something more.