Ex-Childhood Crush

Abbey's POV

Parking the car on the side and making sure that the locks were closed she went to the back seat and snuggled up.
Darkness loomed high above crickets who always freaked her out were chirpping . But other than that it was eerie silence and she wished ducky ducky was there to cuddle. Abbey was scared in the dark because in the dark she could see them without concentrating. In the dark it was effortless to see them.
And she was always scared of them. Their touch was unnatural .

Sleep would not grace it's presence on her.
But everytime she shut her eyelids she saw the horror that awaited her .
At about 12am sleep finally came . And true to her thoughts she dreamt of soldiers getting her , taking of her nails one by one as she screamed in agony.
Or them tying her upside down all the blood rushing to her head and them banging it how she would fall unconsious and they'd rape her . All the stories that were whispered about tortues and the procedere  . How some were cretive.
All  came back to her . And stayed in her thoughts.

She hated when something She didn't want to think off because the situation was not qualified for the situation would come rushing .

Multiple times she woke up in a cold sweat .

"P-please it was just for my mum". she sobbed as she heard the crack of the whip scrambling backwards unable to gulp in airs taking retched breaths .
The smell off waste and blood was high in the air .
Sewage from old prisoners sweats and cries all stayed there .
Looking up from her tears she saw the guy grinning down at her . He had crooked yellow teeth , mouth that was made for torturing .
A person that deserved Hell . She was stark naked her thighs bloody .
A crack was heard as she screamed in pain as the hot whip cracked on her already bloodied thighs . It burned it left a burned mark joing the rest . She begged him too kill her to end her misery that she would do any thing asked of her . Just to kill her off. That she was one body out of million would not be noticed.
And in that moment she thought.  Will i be noticed if i die , am i that important that my place will be missed.
Will my grave get visits or will i only be dumped there and rot while i slowly faded out of people's memories.

" Should have listened to us". He said kicking at her thighs. They screamed with her , she could have welcomed death if she knew it was a possibility.
His boot kicked at her raw exposed flesh that should have been covered by skin .
She couldn't handle it anymore and fell backward her thighs were numb with pain she couldn't feel them.
Her thighs were stinging as if shrads of glass were repeatedly getting cut and stashed on her flesh.

She woke up a scream ready to burst instead of screaming she turned it to sobs.
Her body shook with tears as she held her thighs she could still feel the burn marks even if it was just dreams. It was so very painful and such a possibility. She cried for herslef for her father who must have endured a form of torture himself. If that was just a dream she didn't even want to imagine what it'd feel like if that was real.

There was this one time she dreamt of someone stabbing her waking up she found a scar in the place she was stabbed.

Shakily and still hiccuping Abbey went to the driver's seat and saw the time read 4:47 am . Better get going .

Tears still flowed out her eyes . Dripping down her cheeks and soaking her shirt. She cared not.

No one wanted her , nobody cared for her as much as was expected . No one loved her as much as she should have been loved and that turned her cruel  . Even if she was able to hide that side of her and fake the happy over the top girl.

Her own mother she thought.  Looking down she wiped away a tear that was annoying her.
Her father , her dad was really the only one who truly loved her and when he died he took away a piece of her that no matter who passed in her life it would never be refilled.

She saw the boat That was carrying away the people on the list . Rebels made the organisation every week they picked up and threw the people wanted out the country. 

Heaving a sigh Abbey turned on the music.

Down in the west coast
They got a saying
If your not drinking
Then your not playing

She sang with her . Lana got her lana understood her pain.  Lana could perfectly sing and describe her .

When people knew she liked Lana they asked why.
They said her songs were depressing.
Well you know what i am depressed she'd think.
But instead she'd laugh and say i like her voice. 

Maybe people didn't like her because she was a cruel selfish bitch.
But she made sure she never showed that side of her.
People knew not her dark side.
They only knew her sunny side which they thought was permanent .

People who think personalities are onesided are fools.
Everyone is two faced not some and a couple everyone had two sides too him.
And everyone had different personalities.
Everyone acted differently with different people.
Infront their mother they were the sweet truthful A kid . With their teachers they were either models or i don't give a fuck . With principles I'm so sorry . Girl/boyfriends I'm so cool and such a bad ass . With freinds you wish to be me.

You might have different sides with different people but you do have multiple personalities.
You might not know it but your mind unconsiously changes your clothes to wear something proper for the person  .

Like you wear different things to clubs , weddings , school and church .
You wear different personalities with different people.