Thoughts for the Flames

Person of Thoughts

An Avatar the Last Airbender fanfic! First fanfiction on Wattpad! Enjoy! [If anyone is willing to make a cool cover for the story please message me! I'm bad at making covers haha]

Thinking is something normal for human beings. Some do it more than others, and some don't do it at all. Zuko is a person of thoughts. His nerves and his heart are filled with these thoughts, both good and bad. Mostly bad... very bad. His self-esteem was never something he was proud of... since he had no self-esteem at all. Being told at birth that he would never be good enough... its easy to believe... isn't it? The teen always tried to erase the bad thoughts with happy words... like 'you can do it' or 'you aren't worthless', but it rarely worked... rarely.

 The times when it did work though... those times were the best! Like when him and Sokka managed to break three prisoners out from the Boiling Rock... that made him happy... only for a little while; but that little while meant everything. More than everything, actually.

Sometimes, (more like most of the time) Zuko lets his thoughts keep him company rather than real people. Even though his thoughts can be rude... and in some extents of heartbreaking, he knew that his thoughts would never lie to him. At least... he thought so.

But sitting there... alone... in that room... he couldn't help but let the dreadful thoughts overcome him. Dragging him into this utmost amount of pain. His heart, his nerves, his soul... all being crushed inside of him by the wicked ruler of them all... himself. As if anyone could help him... no one loved him. No one liked him. He was alone... not only in that room but in life itself. Only his thoughts could keep him company. Only the imprints of his tears that are scattered across his soul. Scattered. He thought with a small smile; he liked the sound of it. He would have to remember to take a note of that word later.

Even though everyone was starting to trust him, he couldn't help but think that all they wanted out of him was his bending skills. Then again, Zuko didn't join the Gaang to make friends. He joined them to help the Avatar, Aang. Teach the young airbender the art of firebending. Teach him how to burn the flesh off of his enemies. Teach him how to control the power. Teach him how to do the things he took years learning. Teach him things that he scarcely knew of himself.

It was hard, Zuko concluded, watching Aang as he mastered all of the techniques in just a few weeks. The teen never learned firebending so quickly... but Aang could. This small twelve year-old could do more in a week than Zuko could do in a month. Then again... he is the Avatar. The Avatar... the person who could master all of the elements... and Zuko... a banished prince who couldn't even master one.

His thoughts were interrupted by the sound of footsteps outside of his room. "Hey Sparky... You awake too?" The head of the blind bandit peeked through the open door that led to Zuko's room.

"Uh... yeah." He answered quietly, sitting up. He heard a sigh just before the blind girl walked into his room and sat down on his bed. She bit her nails with a frown, waiting for Zuko to explain why he was up at such an hour. "I couldn't sleep," The teen answered the girl's unspoken question.

"Yeah... I can see that." Toph muttered sarcastically. Oh the irony... Zuko mused. The young twelve year-old let out another sigh before speaking. "Suki and Sokka kept me up," The raven-haired girl rolled her pale eyes at the thought. After finally realizing what Toph meant, Zuko grimaced and shuddered, causing Toph to laugh. "I know right!"

"Well," Zuko gulped with disgust. "I certainly was not up because of... that," The young girl let out another laugh before he continued. "I was just..." Zuko thought for a moment, not really sure of why he was up. "Thinking... that's all."

Toph nodded with amusement. "I've noticed something about you Sparky..." Zuko winced at the nickname while the young girl spoke. "You seem to think a lot." Obviously, Zuko thought, what else can I do?

"Thanks... I guess." Zuko replied back with a questioning tone. Toph smirked and licked her lips.

"Trust me, its a good thing." Toph retorted. "Especially when you're around these people." Zuko furrowed his only eyebrow with confusion, Toph sensed his confusion and continued. "We're all kids, Zuko. Not all of them have matured yet... and when I mean all of them... I'm talking about Twinkle Toes. It seems as if the kid is never gonna grow up."

Zuko nodded in agreement. Aang was extremely childish and always acted as if nothing was wrong... which sometimes was a good thing, seeing that the Gaang needed a lift in spirit at times. The teen thought for a moment longer... at last, realizing something.

I've never been happy... not even as a child, Zuko frowned as the thought entered his mind. He was always on the lookout... always scared. The firebender couldn't even remember a time where he wasn't sad... maybe when his mother was still with him... no. Even back then I hated himself... the only friends I had was my mother and my journal.

Toph shifted awkwardly, not happy with the silence that came between them. "You seem quiet all of a sudden," Zuko didn't reply, causing Toph to bite her lip, sensing Zuko in deep thought. "What is it Sparky?" The young girl asked with (surprisingly) a drop of concern in her voice. The teen jumped a little and looked up at the blind girl.

"Oh... what? Oh nothing." Zuko replied quickly. Toph nodded slowly as she stood up from the bed.

"Okay Sparky... what ever you say~" Toph sang as she walked out of the room, leaving Zuko alone. Toph knew that something was up with Zuko. And she was going to find out what it was.