ᴍʏ ᴍɪssɪɴɢ sᴏᴜʟ || ᴛᴀᴇᴊɪɴᴋᴏᴏᴋ ✅

єριѕσ∂є 48

If someone was so important to you, over time, they would sear a mark on your heart. And whether the person was still kept in mind or not, the mark just wouldn't disappear ever after.

Taehyung tucked Seokjin into the cover. He felt bad all of a sudden. All he wanted to do was look at the plants he had grown for him.

Time went by very fast. It was already the middle of January.

Seokjin would take a little walk when feeling less painful but he wouldn't go too far away from the house. When he was in a bad shape, he would cover himself with a thick cashmere blanket and read books in an armchair. He didn't like TVs or movies because they would dizzy him, which led to heavy headaches. However, reading wasn't that comfortable for him either, he would often fall asleep halfway through a book.

What scared Tae the most now was to see Seokjin fall asleep. He was uptight every time he walked up to him—He was afraid that one day, this man would sleep in peace and never wake up again.

Seokjin noticed that recently, there was less moving-about of Tae in front of him. The man would just mind his own scribbling or doodling near him, acting pretty concentrated.

This day, Taehyung, unlike before, raised his head after he finished his drawing, and had a good stretch in the warm afternoon sunshine. "Your birthday is around the corner, is it?" He then said straightforwardly to Seokjin.

It took Seokjin a while before he realized that someone was speaking to him. He slightly leaned forward and said, "How did you know?"

No one cared about his birthday since he left home a decade ago apart from Jungkook.

Taehyung smiled at him. "Before you filled out the form at the hospital, I took a glance on your ID."

It wasn't a painful day for Jin so he was willing to have a chat with the doctor. "What have you been drawing these days?"

"Secret." Tae acted mingy this time.

The latter wasn't very curious of it anyway. "Well, when will you bring Yeontan over to play with me?" He didn't say the doctor's name, which actually was childishly cute.

"You're immune system is so weak now, it's better to bring it when you get better. Beside Tan goes out every day. It's unhygienic." The immune system of Seokjin's was already vulnerable and that was one big, energetic dog. Taehyung was quite concerned.

How much longer could he wait though? Seokjin was a bit disappointed but he knew he did it for his health.

Tae couldn't bear to see him get upset. He thought for a while and walked up to him. "How about I get your a kitten here?" He asked.

Seokjin was cheered up a little. "I want the one with black whiskers and white feet." He answered.

"The fattest one, I get it," Tae got close to him and said with a smirky face, "Give me a kiss and I'll get it for you."

Seokjin rolled his eyes. "Don't make fun of me."

Tae instantly gave up to the eye roll. He couldn't help himself but swiftly zoomed towards Seokjin's cheek and kissed on it.

Seokjin was so shocked that his pupils dilated.

But thanks to Taehyung's rapid pace, the fluffy little fellow was delivered in time, or else Seokjin would surely slap on his face.

After that little incident, a touch of intimacy and romance broke into their life which had never occurred before. Taehyung was hell of a cheeky guy. At first, he would at most sit next to Seokjin to read books, now the two of them shared a blanket. He would also hold Seokjin around his waist and kiss him on the cheek from time to time.

Taehyung was also a good pleaser. Seokjin wouldn't even read a book when he meant to ignore the older, he would close his eyes and just rest. But Tae would get his poetry out and read those flirtatious, passionate foreign love poems to him. And one time wasn't enough for him, he would read again emotionally in standard British English, and finally, round-three in sexy French.

What a charmer.

Seokjin's heart wasn't made of stone, plus, right now, a company was what he needed the most. Right now, he just couldn't resist Taehyung's sweetness.

Taehyung was the only one, other than Jungkook at the early stage of their relationship, saw Seokjin as the light of his life, but the two men were different. The one Jungkook cherished was the adolescent that was prettier than flowers whereas Taehyung was in love with Seokjin at his worst, the man who had been living with another man for more than a decade, as well as the man who was unpredictable and having a fatal illness.

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The weather in Seoul was far from ideal. Sunny days were rare even when there was no wind or snow. Smog was a regular inhabitant of the city, each inhalation of the air irritated the throats.

It had to be the longest, coldest winter Jungkook ever had, which had forever engraved the despairing gray on his memory. Late night in his bed, there wasn't a single sound around him. He felt like the last human being in this world.

No matter how many times Jungkook rolled over in his large bed, when he abruptly woke up in the middle of the night and reached out to the other half of it, there always lay the coldness, boundless coldness. He was obsessed with cigarette recently, the ashtrays in his house or the company were always packed with cigarette butts. Later, he started to drink, alone at home. If he managed to get himself drunk, another night would just quietly pass. But sobering up at midnight was the worst as solitude just caught him off guard.

More often, he just couldn't sleep well, he was haunted by nightmares. At the most torturing times, next day's nightmare would start from where it ended yesterday and it felt as real as it got. He often dreamt of Seokjin, that he was alone at home with long bangs and in white pajamas, strolling in the massive house over and over again. He didn't raise his head, he was at a slow pace; he opened the doors of every bedroom and then shut them, ceaselessly.

The other day, Jungkook's dream even had sounds it in. Seokjin, who was repeating the same routine as if expecting something behind the doors, at last, sat on the ground, absolutely fatigued. His tears pattered the floor, formed little puddles one after another, while he was saying something in a sad, heartbreaking voice, "Jungkook-ah... I can't find you. Come back to me, please..." The sound of his sobs gradually faded. Jungkook realized the tears on the ground had turned into blood afterwards. And in the end, Seokjin raised his head up—he was pale and haggard, his mouth was full of blood...

Jungkook awakened from the nightmare and was too afraid to keep sleeping.

"It hurt..." He's heart was in so much pain that he curled his entire body into a small ball in order to stay under sadness' radar. "Seokjin, I know I was wrong... please come back..."

At first, Jungkook thought it was pure heartache, the last bit of his conscience, causing the pain. But he then passed out in the company. When he was taken to the hospital, he was told that there was actually something wrong with his heart.

Heartache could cause physical pain. Jungkook's lips turned blue and his eyes dimmed.

He missed his Seokjin.