[17] STATE OF GRACE - KOO JUNGMO

497 17 11
                                    

GENRE: ANGST

Dedicated to: mojungkoo (Enjoy, I know what you like 😩)

Dedicated to: mojungkoo (Enjoy, I know what you like 😩)

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LOSERS IN LOVE - JUNGMO

Love is a ruthless game until you play it good and right.

Cold was the night— but it was one of the things where Jungmo felt comfort around. It was a hectic year nonetheless— business problems, trips and investors dropping out— he was suprised that he even lasted that long and didn't take his own life. If it wasn't for Y/N, he wouldn't be sitting at his own ferris wheel with her counting down to New Year.

Jungmo had his hands on Y/N for a long time now— both metaphorically and literally. She layed her head peacefully on his broad shoulder while Jungmo placed his own on top, whispering sweet nothings onto her ears.

"This is how I exactly want to spend my New Year's eve," Jungmo reached to squeeze her small hands. "With you. Nobody else but you."

Y/N couldn't help but to look at Jungmo with his cheesiness, a smug look at the face of the older. "Jungmo! You killed the vibe, seriously." She stood up and looked over the perfect view of a new year's Gangnam. Breathtaking was an understatement— the city lights were chaotic, which exactly made the view even more beautiful. There were early fireworks of course, and it was hard to think that in a few moments— it would be 2021. And the first person she'll see is Jungmo.

"You love the view?" Jungmo perfectly timed the moment that they were almost at the top, backhugging the 18-year old while he gave her neck some butterfly kisses marking the hickeys he made last night once more. While Y/N's head rolled back, Jungmo watched the lights in eyes become lit once more.

"Tell me you love it." Jungmo trailed his kisses up to her ear, biting the lobe a little. "And I'll tell you I love you." He intertwined his hands with Y/N's, his palms came contact with the back of her hand— raising it up to the glass window of the ferris wheel gondola.

"I-I love it. Everything you do to me Jungmo, I love it." Y/N whimpered. It was a toxic relationship— like everybody says. Being with somebody with nothing but sexual attraction, partially owned by the other party while he's free to see somebody else. It was like falling in and out a loophole of repeated events— a black hole that holds her captive, which she gladly accepts.

Jungmo noticed Y/N's sudden stare away at the view, stopping his antics immediately. He noticed with his Emporio Armani Men's Chronograph Quartz Watch with Metal Strap Watch,  43MM that it was only a few minutes till the New Year— 11:57 PM.

"You okay? You don't seem like in the mood." Jungmo prompted to turn the younger around, seeing that sadness all so sudden became the sparkle of her eyes. His hands founds it way to her angelic face, lingering on her perfectly shaped jaw— "Tell me Y/N. Anything, I'll make you happy."

Y/N then looked up to Jungmo's eyes, his stare sharp enough to slice her into pieces. It wasn't like reading him was easy though— it was a crossword puzzle that even the genuises of history can't solve. Jungmo knew everything about her, but she knew nothing about Jungmo.

"Nothing," Y/N looked away again, causing the latter to frown. "It's just that, the year is ending. Who knows what may happen between us next year. We may fight, we may completely end this relationship."

"Im scared, because you're the only one in my life right now. I don't know what I'll do without you." Those words coming from Y/N were oddly romantic, which just made Jungmo even fall deeper for the younger. He admitted to himself a long time ago that he was already in love with Y/N— even if it clearly said in their contract that they shouldn't fall in love.

On the other hand, he couldn't exactly read what Y/N felt. Sure he always knew what she wanted but never what she felt. It was like dancing on glass— you never know when it'll break unless you keep dancing.

"Shh, Im here. I'll never leave you." Jungmo planted a kiss at her forehead, humming something sweet in the process. "Even at your worst, I'll never leave you."

Y/N couldn't help to unleash her tears, the feeling was overwhelming. Usually, she's blindfolded by silver and gold dreaming of jewelery that Jungmo all so sudden gives to her— but the moment felt too surreal. It was too genuine, as if it was a dream.

"T-Thank you." Y/N decided to escape his figure, breaking away to turn around and enjoy the view. The ferris wheel was almost there— almost at the top and she couldn't wait for the feeling to be there. Maybe there, she can find a state of grace that only Jungmo can make her feel.

The rich man didn't even have to glance at his watch— the new year was signalled by the blaring noices of combined trumpets, car horns and fireworks. The sky lit up in colors that you wouldn't think would be pretty, replacing the stars as it took it's turn to shine.

"Happy New Year princess," Jungmo backhugged once again, Y/N returning a slight smile. "You're the best gift I ever had, and I swear to never let you go. Ever."

It wasn't only Jungmo the loser in love in here, it was Y/N too. Maybe they weren't ready yet— maybe it wasn't the time to confess yet. Maybe those words can be held back and said another time, when they're comfortable. When they're sure it's love, when? Someday, maybe.

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