The idiot's twin sister

Episode 3: Droit de seigneur Ben part one

I was in the living room with Janey and mum Janey yelling in the phone to dad.

"YOU DID WHAT!" 

"That's right denial all responsibility!" 

"You might think this is funny, but you've completely ruined my life!"

"Who was that?" Mum asks Janey.

"He's ruining my life!" Janey replies.

"Ah, Your father." 

"Do you know what he did?" 

"Is it multiple choice or essay?"

  "He set me up on a blind date."

"Ah, that's so..."

"Repulsive?"

 "Weird?" I hoped into the conversation. 

"I was going to say "sweet"." Mum says.

"First of all, Dad has no judgement." Janey says Nick and Micheal walks in throwing a football. "He wears socks with sandals and has hair in his ears he never trims. "

"Actually, it's impressive that a human can carry such lush vegetation can carry in their ears." Nick says.

"This is dad  we are talking about. Can you imagine the kind of loser he'd pick as a date?!" Janey says forgetting mum is here.

"Me?" mum says.

"What's that?" Micheal asks pointing at the record player in Mum's hand.

"This is Mozart's Don Giovanni - one of the greatest operas of all time."

"No that, with the hole in the middle." Micheal asks.

"I just felt myself age 50 years would you take that thing out of here?" Mum says talking about the ball. But Nick being Nick drop the ball to the floor and lifts Micheal throwing him on his shoulder walking away.

"Did your father says when he was coming home?" Mum asks unbothered of what Nick done.

"Hopefully, never."

"Don't be rude."  

"Oh so sorry mummy daddy didn't say when he is coming home. he was too busy mucking up my puking life!" Janey says polite too rage.

"Much better." 

"You might not find this whole thing so 'sweet' when I jump off tower bridge and I'm swept out to sea." Janey says.

"Don't be so dramatic dear while the Thames is an estuary, you pathetically life of your body will probably only swept only as far as barking. Which I believe lacks some of the romance you'd want." 

Nick comes back and jumps onto the couch start reading a magazine.

"Isn't there another room you can go to?" Janey asks Nick.

"I'm not bothering you." 

"You're in my line of sight." 

"Don't take it out on everyone just because dad has to find you dates." I say.

"I don't need anyone to find me date especially with a posh git I'm meant to drool over because his dad's Lord Whitebum or something." Janey says.

"You mean Lord Whitten?" Nick asks. "' Enjoying a joke with his lovely wife Serena and their family at crufts.'"

"What have you got there?"

"there is a picture of all them in Hello."

"Yeah, right!" Janey remembers Nick never lies and runs towards Nick and snatch the magazine.

"Oi!" 

"My God! That's his son?! He's absolutely gorgeous. Hey Maddie looks at this hey how about join me find a guy and we can have a double date." Janey says Confused on why she would like to join me looking at her i could see the very very slight nervousness that she hides from everyone. She has always been a slight bit nervous round boys since i told her the real reason i left university so i just nodded. Janey runs out the room t o the kitchen to call everyone she knows.

"Who is going to be your date. I thought you hate dating now."

"I am bringing a friend who is head over hill with me all I need to do is bat my eyelids and he will pay all our dinner now more concrete thing what to wear." I said jumping of the couch running upstairs.

I hear Janey come back in to the living room. "Where she going?" "To choose her outfit." "Why didn't I think of that." Janey runs with me i tried heading to my room but Janey dragged me into hers. We emptied out her wardrobe and dragged my clothes to her room choosing an outfit. Finnaly found a black dress up above.

"That's gorgeous Mad's." Janey says we both then left after light makeup and hair style. We drove to this really posh restaurant I informed Janey Max my 'date' is paying and she informed me her date can pay as well. We both picked the most expensive starter then dinner then some deserts. After everything was payed for Janey left with her date I called an Uber. While waiting me and my date sat on the floor. He was trying every thing like holding my hand and wrapping a arm around my shoulder I ignored his tactics though. We both heard a yell of pain in the direction of the pain I saw Janey jump out of the car and ran to me. Her date followed her.

"Hey what happened?" I asked Janey as she hugged me tight crying on my shoulder.

"She just jumpe-"

"I Asked Her!" I cut Janey date off glaring at him.

"He didn't stop... When I said no." Janey hiccuped out. I saw my Uber arrive and behind Janey date I walked past him and placed Janey inside and walked to the driver he was a buff bloke with a bunch of tattoo including the names of his two daughters.

"Hey Maddie every thing okay?" The driver says you see I know him well he was always here at the right time he knows me so well and planning to even have my name on one of his arms.

"This creep refused to stop when my little sister told him to." I told him.

"Do you want me to sort him out." Sam the driver says.

"Yes please." I said he got out of the car while the dick tried to explain how rich he is one punch the dick was down my date has ran away being the coward he is. Sam the drove us home. When we got in dad was listening to opera Janey walked straight upstairs as all she wanted to do is go bed.

"Hey Janey, Maddie." We ignored him. "Hey hold on."

Janey stopped causing me to as well she sighed putting on a fake smile towards dad.

"How did it go?" Dad asks.

"It was fine dad it was fine." She turned around then back around her voice get louder. "It wasn't just fine it was brilliant." She went up the stairs more but back down. "In fact it was so brilliant I think you should give up dentistry and start up your OWN DATING AGENCY OKAY NOW STOP GRILLING ME AND LEAVE ME ALONE!"

I sighed know the end of that sentence was meant for her terrible date. She ran up the stairs while I ran after her.