Cursed

࿏ Chapter Twenty-Three ࿏

Hayden

When Rory teases me about tearing off her underwear, I'm instantly turned on. She's becoming quite the libertine. All thoughts about the drug dealers refusing to sell me their supply in Iowa City are being pushed away. Those fucking junkies are worthless. Even though my withdraw symptoms are coming in hot, fucking Rory becomes my number one priorty.

I want to tease her back so I pull out my Swiss Army knife from my pocket and flip open the blade. She gasps at the sight of it and scoots further back onto the hood of the car. I lean up to her ear and suck on the lobe.

"I'm not going to hurt you. Don't you trust me?"

She gives me a nervous smile and lays back down. I grab the crotch part of her panties and pull the fabric down and away from her body. My knife goes through creating a little slit and I applaud myself at the brilliant idea.

"Now you have crotch-less panties."

Rory looks down and giggles at the sight of her underwear that now has a massive hole in the bottom. Getting as low as I can on the car, I bury my mouth in between her legs. She's already wet but I need to make sure she is ready for more. I'm interrupted by her hands gripping the sides of my shirt and pulling me up.

"Hayden, I need you inside of me now!"

"Fine, have it your way."

I say as I grab a condom from my pocket and get ready to be inside her. With the condom on, I can't help but tease her further. I put myself in her halfway and then quickly pull out. She whines and sits up.

"Now what are you doing?"

"I was just noticing how utterly romantic it is to be fucking you under the stars, Ro."

We both look up and admire the crystal clear sky filled with twinkling stars and planets. Nights like this are something that I would surely miss if I lived in a big city. I glance over at Rory and I can tell that she's just as mesmerized by the beauty of the night as I am by her own beautiful face. Before she can look back at me I grab her head in my hands and kiss her hard.

Even though being with Rory has added complications to my lifestyle, I could never imagine being without her. Rory grabs me by my hips and spins us around so that I'm sitting on the hood of the car. I've already unzipped my pants for her. I now have easy access with the hole in her underwear. She climbs up on top as I help her to lower herself onto me. I can't help but moan as she starts to ride my cock.

"Oh god you feel so tight."

Her thighs look like milk against the black of the night sky. The sight of which brings me that much closer to exploding. As if she senses my excitement she starts riding me harder. She's so wet for me and yet I feel like I'm being squeezed in the best possible way.

Her hips are thrusting up and down on mine like she's on the merry-go-round and I do everything in my power not to come too quickly. I can feel her pulsing and I know she's about to come too. Just before she does I put one hand on her waist with the other on her clit, and I rub her off as we both orgasm together. She sits on top of me for a minute to catch her breath. I admire her chest as it heaves up and down with each exhalation. I lift her off me, gently separating us. We lay side by side, soaking up the all smells and sounds of midnight in the countryside. The cicadas are buzzing in the corn fields on either side of us.

"Ro, I know I don't always do the things for you that you deserve. I just need you to know that I'm trying really hard. I want to be better for you."

"I know. I just wish that you could be more honest with me about your feelings. No matter what is going on with you, I will always love you."

I know that she's being sincere when she tells me this, but it's just not possibly for her to still love me after she finds out how fucked up I really am. I've always known that my luck would run out with her, but I'm determined to make this last as long as possible.

"I love you too."

She nuzzles her head into my shoulder. I lift up my arm so she can move even closer to me. Everything that I've lacked in my childhood is beginning to heal with her head on my shoulder. All of my sense of purpose is fulfilled by her love for me. I can never lose her.

Rory talks more about her plans for our future but I can't hear what she's saying. All I can concentrate on is this feeling in my left ankle. I need to crack the bone but it won't pop. That's when it hits me. God damn it I'm withdrawing! I suddenly leap off of the car and it scares Rory.

"Are you ok?"

"It's time to go babe."

She looks at me skeptically. I can't let her know that every bone in my body is fiending to get high. I need to assure her that everything's fine.

"But I want to hear all about your plans for us in the car on the drive home. Please Rory, I didn't mean to scare you."

She nods in acceptance of my weird behaviour. I give her a quick peck on the cheek before we get into the car. I back the car around on the gravel road and head towards the highway, leaving our hidden sex-spot behind.

I can't help but tap my fingers on the thick purple steering wheel cover that Rory got to make her car look cuter. She notices my anxious behaviour but thankfully doesn't question me about it. Instead I ask her more questions to distract myself. My fucking insides feel like they're burning up. There's a voice in the back of my head that's screaming but I do my best to ignore it and focus on what Rory's saying.

"I think we should at least look for other places."

"What do you mean?"

"Hayen, have you been listening to a single word I've said?"

"Yes babe. I just like my apartment the way it is."

Of course I lied. I can't repeat a single word she's said back to her even if my life depends on it.. But the suggestion of moving out of my apartment is impactful enough to snap me back to reality.

"Hayden, I'm not trying to hurt your feelings. But your apartment is a shit show. There's literally wallpaper peeling off the walls in some rooms. The hot water faucet in the kitchen sink stays cold no matter how far you turn it. The bathtub has mold growing around it and there's a variety of strange smells in every single room!"

"Yeah well I guess I never noticed that."

"Not only that but I want to make a home for us. As a couple."

If Rory and I move into a new place together, then she would have complete surveillance of all of my activities. My fingers stop tapping the wheel while I'm sent deeper into my thoughts about creating a home with Rory.

"If we moved in together. Just you and me. Then I would need to know you wouldn't run away to your parents house if things get hard again."

"Hayden, it's always going to be just you and me. I promise."

She puts her hand on my thigh for the rest of the drive. When we pull up to my place I can't help but agree with her. This apartment is shitty.

"I bet you could make the most beautiful home for us, Rory. A lot has happened tonight and I think we both need a good night's sleep. Can we look for apartments in the morning?"

"That sounds really good. I love you Hayden."

"I love you Aurora."