Finding you

Chapter 19

A/N: This chapteris in Arizona's view again. Please let me know if you liked the chapter from Callies view and don't forget to leave feedback and to vote<3 thank you:)

I woke up from my nap about 10am german time zone.
I landed pretty early so the first thing I did when we was at home, was take a shower and then go to sleep. When I woke up, it took me a few seconds to realize that I'm not laying in Callies Arms. I took a deep breath before I crawled out of my bed. Nick was already at work so I was alone. I saw that my voicemail was ful, so I started playing it. Callie. Every single voicemail was from Callie. I started tearing up when I heard how she explained herself, said that she was truly sorry and that she loved me, that everyone was afraid of where I was and if I was ok. But I needed some time for me alone to think about everything. I felt bad, not even leaving a message where I would go and that I'm safe. Should I write a message? Explaining myself, telling them where I was and that I'm fine? That I maybe coming back? Before I noticed it, I had dialed Callies number and called her. It didn't took her long to answer.
"Arizona? Arizona are you alright?" She asked. I could tell she had cried and was worried about me.
"Caliope I'm fine! Ok I'm ok. I just need some time to think."
"Arizona please hear me out, I'm so so sorry!" She cried now.
"Caliope I have to go! I love you! More than anything!" I cried in the phone and with that I hung up. The last thing I could hear was her trying to say ' I love you too' but I hung up after the word love. I turned out my phone, knowing Callie would try to call me. After it was completely out, I threw it across the room and collapsed crying on the floor. I never felt so much pain and love at the same moment. Then I remembered Callies letter from Christmas, it should still be in one of my bags. After I found the letter, i took a deep breath
and opened it.                                                                     
'Dear "Grouchy"
When you entered the door the first time, I was flashed. Flashed from how beautiful you look, I felt in love with this magic smile you gave me, as you shaked my hand. That was the moment I knew it. "Shit! I just felt deeply in love with an yet unknown woman".
I knew I would try make you feel the same, but I've never thought it would work. But it did. It worked. We know us for a quiet while now and these butterflies, I felt the first time I saw you, are getting more and more with every second.
When you read the letter until here without crying, I'm amazed, but it gets even better.
When I woke up, the first night you slept here, I knew you would come downstairs and would try to fell back asleep on the couch (Well at least I hoped so). And as you came, I felt my heart skip a beat.
There are thousands of things that I would love to say to you, but there aren't the right words to explain how deeply in love I am with you and how happy I am that I met you. There are no words for how much I love it, when you say "Caliope" or when, the first thing in the morning your doing, is to say that you need coffee or want to go take a shower. I love watching you when you think about something, how you bite your lip and don't notice it. I love the way you grimace when you eat pickles. And when you asleep you, you talk sometimes. It fills my heart with love, joy, happiness and so much more. But the most important thing is that I love you and will never stop loving you. And there is nothing and nobody who could change that, change my feelings for you. Arizona Robbins Don't you dare to ever leave me! I love you and I need you in my life and I hope that you feel the same about me.
Merry Christmas My love!
Caliope '

As I was done reading, I couldn't help but smile and cry. I love her so much that it hurts. Suddenly all the pain and anger I had were gone and I started to realize what I did. I picked up my phone and turned it on.
Hoping that Callie would answer, I dialed her number.
"Honey, Honey it's me! Come to me please! Please I'm so sorry for what I did and I need to explain to you. Everything. Come here!" I cried in my phone as I heared that Callie had picked up. I couldn't stop blaming myself for what I did.
"Arizona! Arizona you need to tell me where you are. I'll come but tell me where you are!" She cried in the phone. I couldn't clearly think.
"Please come here! I'm so so sorry!" I cried between sobs. I'm not even sure if she understood anything from what I said, but I tried my best.
"Germany! I'm in Germany! Please come to Germany!" I yelled still crying.
"I'm on my way honey! Everything's ok! Ok? I'm coming! Calm down honey!" She said, calming me down. I nodded my head, forgetting about the fact that she can't see me.
"I love you!" She cried.
"I love you too!" I said. We hung up and I felt kind of relieved. I would get her back, I would get another chance not to ruin our relationship again. I read the letter over and over and over again. And it always felt like reading it the first time. It's not my smile that is magical, it Callie. Her love, her joy and everything about her.