HIM .. Joe Goldberg

FORGET

"FOR THE LOVE of Christ, would you just leave me alone?"

I was dancing, love. Who would've known my greatest hit would be without you? Your very presence made me trip, fuck up and regret even trying and damn anything that has that much power over me. I was gracefully gliding on the ice of life, like a pretty wisp of breath on a winter's night. Moving and existing and okay and you just had to ruin it all for me, didn't you?

You don't take me seriously, though. You never did, I'm not sure why I should expect anything different now.

No, I should expect something different now. Not because there's a change in your behavior, but because there's a change in mine.

The mirror was empty except for my reflection, but whenever I looked into it I saw you over my shoulder. I didn't dare flinch back or peek to see if you'd still be there, I just stared at your ghostly image. Daring you to come closer. Taunting, even. The bathroom smelled like death and outside the bar was hectic with a local radio's channel and a bunch of drunk banter. I had escaped for a moment of peace, when I found you.

You don't even remember my sister, I bet. The way you held her head under water. You saw me and your eyes shined with ambition, never even guessing that mine gleamed with trauma. I fell in love because you were the most gentle man I've met in my life, even after murdering her. Dad slapped me, my mom screamed about how I wasn't normal. Even when I was thirteen and you visited to take her out on a date, the way you rubbed your hand against my cheek and offered a cheap smilie. It's okay. You're fucked up, but its okay. Your sister is hot. You could've killed the world then, and I'd still trust you. The man who offered affection to a dirty child, the child never forgets.

Beck enters the ladies room with a joyful laugh. "So here's where you've been hiding!" She exclaimed, wrapping her arms around my collarbones and giggling against the croak of my neck, flesh becoming moist with her spit. You're jealous? You live in the walls of my reality, where you can peek and seek.

"Beh-Brit. There's some hot dudes out there." She hiccuped, her frail body jumping for a moment. "Let's ruin their lives."

"Can we forget about tomorrow?" I turn away from you and smile at her.

Beck's smile was so wide, tears began to press from her hazel eyes. "Let's forget we even lived."