HIM .. Joe Goldberg

SOULMATE

THE HAMMER HAS A RED GRIP WITH INDENTS IN THE SHAPE OF FINGERS. It fits nicely in my purse, beside my Michael Kors wallet and pack of cigarettes. Hannah doesn't see me grab it, and I don't intend her to. She'll know soon enough.

"We're running low on cash," Hannah says as she smears on an extra layer of red lipstick. "I'm also getting bored, I want new friends."

"Why? So you can fuck their boyfriends too?" I retort, a bit too bitterly to be played off as sarcasm.

Hannah sighs, rolling her eyes. She looks at me from her reflection in the mirror and smiles condescendingly. "You know I was just playing."

"Could've fooled me." I grumble, sitting on the bed. My purse is on my lap and I zip it closed.

Hannah laughs. "I was still high from being with Liam, what can I say? I enjoy the male body, and he was the closest male around."

"I don't fucking care that you were sniffing crank with Liam," I snap. "Stay away from Joe."

Hannah turns to face me, jaw dropped and eyes leveled. She can't believe I used such a tone with her, I'm supposed to be her friend. She doesn't think she did anything wrong. Every offense is minor within a strong friendship, even when a vein was sliced and I'm bleeding, bleeding, bleeding out. Not this time, Hannah. Her damage is irreparable. She scarred me deep. How dare she go after you? My love, my life, my everything?

I was meticulous in my target—you—I had everything planned. Except for unreliable best friends. Was the whole thing with Liam just an act? Did she have eyes on you much before then, before we even spoke? Were you still with my sister when Hannah first saw you?

Hannah stands up. She's ready to go. Off to entice a cult, draw Charlie's schemes into impressionable minds, make a few bucks off of ignorance. It beats doing a 9-5 at some desk job.

"You ready? Or you wanna threaten me more?" Hannah is cheeky. Slick. She knows how to throw a fireball back.

I rise from the bed. My purse is heavy, I like feeling the weight on my shoulder. I smile at my best friend turned traitor. It's all about you, Joe. You, you, you.

"I think I got it out of my system." I lie.

We're all so cynical, yet so critical. She smiles at me and I see her irritated nostiles, the cocaine is brushed off though her flesh is still stained red. She likes drugs. Do you like them? "You sure? You were pretty raw to me when he was here."

I smile. "You noticed?"

"Of fucking course I did, you passive aggressive asshole. I won't fuck him, Brit."

But can I trust her?

We leave just as the sun dips passed the horizon. I smoke a cigarette as we walk through Central Park, and I can't help my glare even though Hannah shoots daggers at me for it. I'm thinking of the night before, how her head was on your shoulder. I hate it, Joe. You're mine. We'll get married, I'm going to wear a perfect white dress as your eyes drip with tears of irrevocable happiness.

The weight of the hammer hangs from my shoulder. Do you actually think I'd let anything get in the way of true love? I'm a romantic, Joe. I believe soulmates, I believe that when two people are meant for each other it becomes clearer than anything else in the world. That's how I feel now. Everything is suddenly so clear. I need you, you need me. I'd be damned if anything get in our way. Lovers, Joe. That's what we are. Bonnie and Clyde, Adam and Eve. I'm your pretty rose, and my thorns will sting Hannah until she learns her fucking place.

Aren't you so excited for the future? I am.

Hannah is complaining. "Saturday night, and there's no one but old married couples. What the fuck?" I unzip my purse.

Do you think about our kids? Will they have light hair or dark hair?

I rise the hammer, my fingers tightly wrapped around the red hilt. Red. We'll be seeing a lot of that on our way to paradise, won't we?

Hannah is stammering for words. "Brit- Brit, what are you doing? What'd you bring that for?"

There are tears in my eyes, and I hate myself for what I'm about to do. But I can't have anything get in the way of us. "You want Joe."

"What? Fuck off, Brit. I'm dating Liam."

I step forward. The moon has rose over Hannah's shoulder, illuminating her beautiful figure. I feel jealous, insecure. My grip tightens. Of course you want her, who wouldn't? Did you meet me just to get to her?

I blink, tears spill down my cheek. I lift up the hammer higher. "He's my world. He's my everything. Did you touch him?"

"What would Charlie think if you hurt me?"

I choke on my sadness. "I don't care."

I hit her. She falls after a single blow, her head spilling with radiant blood.

Red. We will be seeing a lot of red.

Happy Valentine's Day! Go obsess over someone ;)