MY HEAD is absolutely throbbing. White Zinfandel is the sweetest fucking wine I've ever tasted, burning my nose whenever I bring the brim of the bottle to my lips. I have an ashtray on my bare chest with a lit cigarette between my fingers, a long strand of ash forming at the end. I'm tired, tired, tired. Mentally, tired. Not physically. Physically, I could run a race. Or drink all night until the sun comes up. Whichever comes first.
I'm sick of the drama, Joe.
Truly, that's all this is. Drama. My life is a goddamn play and I'm simply at the worst scene. The main character is suffering through a climax; it comes with being exceptional. I'm sure you understand. However, Joe, you're an awful piece of shit and I'm ready to be rid of you. Characters get written off of work all the time—the show must always go on.
The anger, the tears. The panic and anxiety and my God I'm sick of it. I'm not only sick of you, Joe. I'm sick of all of you. The pathetic swill you force us to swim, the iron grasp you have yet you still can't allow a single bit of ease for us to breathe. I'm not only sick of you, I'm sick your kind. I'm sick of men.
It's time for me to broaden the possibility that my soulmate is completely unconventional. Two outliers stickin' it to the man, a renegade within love and with such bright smiles, we blind those who dare argue against our nature.
Yes, Joe Goldberg. Fuck you. Fuck you and every human like you. I see my worth now, and I see where I'm needed.
It's time I find a woman.
YOU ARE READING
HIM .. Joe Goldberg
FanfictionMaybe I am wearing this dress just for you. Maybe I've had a crush on you since before you ever laid eyes on me. You'd be right, Joe. I do have a crush, and it burns like the radiant sun.
