Power and Lies

Twenty- Three

The fiddles could be heard up the hill and she had attuned her listening to them. Closing her eyes she laid back into the grass and took it all in, the day, the happiness John seemed to have found accidentally, the drinks flowing. This was peace, even Freya could admit that much. It was a foreign feeling to her, and she found herself unsettled, as though at any moment something may happen. So many things had already happened the last two years, she felt they were due a casual night for once.

She did not feel the grass shift next to her and she stifled a cry when someone lightly tapped her arm. With wide eyes she searched for the person in the lantern's light and began to calm her heartbeat when Ada's face came into view.

"I am sorry I frightened you," She muttered.

"It's alright. I should've been more aware anyway," Freya countered, trying to put the woman at ease. She had not spoken to Ada in so long, but when she looked at her now she looked different. She still had the rebellious streak within her that all the Shelby's showed, but her cheeks were rounder, swollen with the look of impending motherhood. Freya touched onto her own stomach wondering if that were to ever be her future. She could imagine it- Tommy a loving father, her a loving mother. It seemed plausible enough. "How are you?"

"Better now that I am off my feet," The girl laughed. "I am ready to meet him." Her hands rubbed the swell of her abdomen with tenderness. Freya wanted to ask her how she knew it was a boy, but she bit her tongue. This was a moment to just exist, not to banter.

"He will be beautiful, like all of you." Freya warmly noted. The Shelby bunch were all beautiful.

"Do you think you and him will have children?" Ada nodded her head in the direction of Tommy and Freya could feel the blush rise on the surface of her cheeks. She itched to tell her future sister-in-law about the marriage plans, but still she held it back. It was a small thing she held in for herself. A small, warm place only for her. "I can tell he loves you enough to have one."

"Yeah, maybe."

"It wasn't an accident you know- that day in the shop when you saw me take that cough syrup. It wasn't an accident." Freya looked at Ada incredulously, her mouth slightly agape. "I had been watching you for a while. All trapped up in that house of yours with that ruddy husband. Tommy had me watching you for him. Thought you would be the way to get rid of that man." In some way, she supposed, it was true. She had been the way to get rid of Lee, but the way he was disposed of she had to admit had left a bit to be desired. "I have to say, I did not see this being the outcome of that."

"What outcome did you see?" Freya asked, her mind spinning with new revelations.

Ada did not answer and Freya realized it was just as well she did not. Her mind danced around memories of the first time they met, he had asked if she was a whore. If he had known she was not then why did he pull her through a maze of mystery? She could see him, his arm wrapped around his brother as they danced near the fire, their heads thrown back in laughter. She wondered if it even mattered how they came to this moment, although she knew it did. Looking upon him now her heart fluttered with conflict. Surely she would confront him eventually. For now she would not ruin a good party.

It was not much longer before Freya picked herself up intent on carrying herself home. The fire was starting to die and the bodies of drunks were spread out upon the grass. She could see the Shelby family locked in tense conversation and decided that, just for tonight, she would allow herself to walk away from them.

Her mind spiraled as she walked towards the alleyway that would lead her to her car. How much had been true and how much had been false? How many times were they all just playing a game with her? Where had the lies started and had they ever even ended? With the roar of her car starting she promised herself she would push it from her mind. There would be answers later, she would see to that. For now all she wanted to do was sleep. Her heart ached as she drove trying to decide which home to return to- her own or the one she shared with Tommy. One felt like a stranger and one felt like a traitor. She was not sure which was worse. In the end she continued on toward Tommy's house, disappointed when it did not bring her the warm happiness it normally did.

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When Tommy arrived home she had nestled into his chest like normal, listening to the soft pitter patter of his heartbeat as she closed her eyes. This time it did not lull her to sleep. This time she listened to it for deceptions. She begged the sound to let her know of his lies. But the soft rhythmic beat did nothing to quell her fears and curiosities. Tommy looked at her with half closed eyes, his pupils glazed over with drink and emotion.

"What is it?" He questioned and she tried her best to turn away. It took only a second before his hand had her face captured, forcing her to maintain eye contact with him. "I said,'' What is it?"

"Ada said you had her watching me before we met." He released her suddenly, his gaze softening. The put in her stomach grew larger with every second of silence that passed between them.

"Yes." He finally said, his tone that of business and not of tenderness. "Your husband killed my man. He posed a threat, he had more connections than he told you my pretty little bird. He was more violent and cruel than even I am." Freya thought back to his stinging remarks and cruel commands. It was something she could see as a truth. "-so I made Ada watch you. Learn your habits, see if you were the same way as Lee."

"So you had her watch me so you could manipulate me and kill my husband?" Confusion set in, biting away at the bits of resolve she had around the situation.

"It does not matter what brought us here. Only that we are here." He leaned over, pushing his lips against her forehead. She pushed him away, ignoring the look of rejection on his face.

"So has all of this been a lie?" She choked up as she said it and he reached for her once more. "Am I still only a pawn for something? How much of this is real Tommy? I thought maybe-" tears streamed down her face before she could finish even speaking. I thought maybe I had finally found my place.

"I love you." Tommy stared at her and she stood, making her way out to the living room. She would speak no more on it tonight. She did not have the heart for it.