transboo 2

Chapter 6

tw: transphobia (deadnaming, etc.), mention of abuse

ranboo pov:

we arrive at the hospital, but something is immediately off. karen is outside the hospital, seemingly waiting for us; she told us she'd meet us in my dad's room. why is she out here?

'what are you doing here? i asked, outraged because she couldn't even do the simplest of things correctly.

'hey, hey,' she says, holding her hands up in mock surrender, 'let me explain before you bite my head off, hannah.'

'im going to fucking bite your head off if you keep using my deadname, karen. but, whatever, explain yourself.' i scoff.

'i gave you that name, what's wrong with it?' she shoots back, not even daring to look at my friends behind me, for i know they are all shooting daggers with their eyes.

'you KNOW what's wrong with it, we are not having this argument again right now. can you please just explain yourself so i can see dad.'

'oh yeah, of course,' she grinned, suspiciously, 'so he actually got discharged this morning, he's at home. which is obviously why i'm here; you blocked me so i couldn't contact you.'

'right? well i'm not going anywhere with you, alone, so i'll direct phil to dad's house and i guess i'll just see you there?'

this seemed to throw her off guard, as if she was expecting me to happily hop into a car with her. she's fucking delusuional.

i turn around, not waiting for her response - if there even was one - and the others follow my direction and head back to the car. once we get into the car, phil turns to me in the front passenger seat so i can direct him correctly to my dad's house.

'do you not think this is a bit weird, mate. like, i don't trust her - never have, never will - but especially not now. i feel like she's lying to try and hurt you again. i don't want to put you in danger, mark.'

he used my real name, he's serious. phil, techno, tubbo and tommy mainly call me ranboo except when they're being serious or if i'm not paying attention. so now i'm as scared as phil seems to be.

'phil,' i say, my voice breaking as i fight off tears, 'i'll be fine.'

obviously, my voice breaking didn't help to prove my point, but phil new i wasn't going to be able to sleep until i made sure my dad was okay, so he gave in and we're soon on our way to my parents home.

'we're here!' i exclaim, as we turn onto their road. phil pulls up at the right house number and as the car comes to a stop, i turn around to face everyone.

'guys, stay in the car. i'll be safe, okay?' i try to give them a reassuring smile, their faces are heartbreaking for me to leave.

tommy is full of guilt, worry and regret. i'm not sure why he's guilty or regretful considering none of this would be his fault if anything bad happened; his face is almost saying 'please don't leave' like a puppy who's owners are just going to work.

phil looks torn between letting me go by myself or coming with me, like a parent who's afraid to give their child any responsibility or independence, but knows that it's vital for their growth.

techno and tubbo have very similar emotions, or lack thereof. their faces have this sort of zoned-out, glazed-over look, as if they're avoiding feeling anything right now, scared that it would upset me or them or everyone.

'you guys stay here,' i repeat, reassuring myself more than anyone, 'i promise i'm going to be okay. i'll be no longer than half an hour. if i'm any longer, just come knock on the door. you will be able to see us leave if they try to take me somewhere - there's no way out the back and we're right outside so don't worry about that.'

'what if they try to keep you inside?' tubbo says, his voice laced with fear that is yet to show on his face.

'they legally can't. just call the cops. remember, i'll be okay, you'll be okay. if anything happens, i love you.'

i give them another half-hearted smile as i get out of the car, heading towards the place i thought i'd never see again.

before i even get to the door, karen opens it, smiling slightly down to me in an almost creepy manner.

'hannah! darling, come in! i've missed you so much!' she says, trying to hug me, which i swiftly duck out the way of.

'karen, i saw you almost half an hour ago.'

'it seems like decades! come in, come in! your father is so excited to see you!' she's acting so so strange. why is she being so nice? except for the fact she used my deadname, of course.

i decide to follow her in the house anyway, a grave mistake. unknown to me, my dad was stood behind the door, waiting for me to step inside so he could slam and lock it shut. great.

'dad?' i ask, tentatively, 'what's happening, what's going on? are you okay?'

he laughs, 'am i okay? the real
question is if YOU are okay. what makes you think that living your life as the wrong gender is good? you're not a boy!' he laughs again, 'you never were! kids these days.' and he laughs again for a third time, dryly and spitefully.

'what the fuck, TRISTAN?' i say, using my dad's real name now as i don't think he's deserving of that title any longer.

'oh we can all play that game, HANNAH. what made you think, of all names, MARK? like at least pick a decent goddamn name if you're going to fake your gender.'

tears well up in my eyes, but they haven't spilled yet, 'it's not FAKE! the amount of times you've heard me and karen have this argument, i swear you should know what normally happens.'

'oh, of course i know what normally happens,' he looks over my shoulder to meet karen's eyes and they both start laughing maniacally, 'she hits you.'

'so now why should we change tradition?'

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1040 words

sorry for the late update again i'm trying to bring more chapters out <3