Our Broken Girl

Chapter Four

   I set Lilly down on the toilet seat as I start to run the water. I adjust the temperature until it is perfect before I drop the plug in the drain. I grab some lavender scented bubble bath and dump some into the water. I grab a bag of Epsom salts and dump some into the water. I swirl my hand around in the water mixing the Epsom salts around, letting them melt into the steamy water. While I get the bath ready Lilly and I don’t speak. She sits on the lid of the toilet and just stares at the wall in front of her. She looks almost dead. There is barely any movement coming from her besides the rise and fall of her chest and the slow blinks of her eyes.

I let out a heavy sigh as I shut off the water and turn to her. “Alright girl, I’m going to put you in the tub. Sadly, I can’t lift you so I need you to help me.” Her eyes flick to me and it sucks my soul from my body. This wasn’t the same girl I grew up with, the light was gone. In its place is an impossibly massive darkness. I drop my eyes from her face and stand up putting my arms around her waist. Slowly her arm comes around my shoulders and together we push up. Slowly we shuffle to the tub and wrap my other arm around her waist also. “One leg up.” I whisper to her softly and she follows my command, raising one leg slowly and then sinking it in to the water.

“Good.” I give her a smile, “Now the other.” She does the same with the other leg and soon she is standing in her bath. “Good job, now lets sit. We’ll go slow.” Together we sink down her in the water, me beside the tub until we are both sitting down. “Good.” I pull my arms back and set my hands on the edge of the tub.  “I need to get a cup so I can wash your hair. I’ll be right back.” I push myself up and walk out, leaving the door slightly opened. As I pass by the men look at me expectantly. I just give them a small smile before grabbing a small plastic cup from the cabinet and going back to the bathroom with Lilly. I sit back down next to the tub with the cup in my hands.

“Lets get this gunk out of your hair beautiful.” I put a hand under her chin and help her to tilt her head back. She whimpers but doesn’t try to fight, just closes her eyes. I fill the cup up with water from the tub and then pours it over her hair. I start at her scalp and work to the ends until the hair is completely saturated. I set the cup down on the side of the tub and then grab the shampoo. I squirt some into my palm and rub it between my hands before working it into Lilly’s hair. I scrub her scalp trying to break the dirt loose from her skin. She whimpers and I grimace, “Sorry love, I need to get this stuff out.” I work to the ends, my fingers getting tangled up in the matts. “Sorry..” I mumble as I work my fingers loose and grab the cup again.

I fill the cup again and I work the shampoo out of her hair. I watch the dirt and shampoo running into the water turning the water and bubbles into a murky brown color. I wrinkle my nose and then pull the plug from the drain. “I’ve got to get some fresh water in here.” As I let some of the water drain out I work conditioner into her hair and when the water reaches her hips I plug the drain again and turn the facet on. I let the water fill up again, add more bubble bath, and when the water reaches the middle of her ribcage I turn it off. “Alright lets get this skin clean.” She drops her head back down so she isn’t staring at the ceiling anymore. I search the bathroom before finding a stack of washcloths. I grab two and then sit back down. I dip both into the water and I hand one to her.

“I know it may be awkward but I need you to clean your private area.” She glances at me her eyes growing wide. They start to fill up with tears and her head shakes. “We need to get all the blood, and dirt off of you or you’ll get an infection.” She looks up at me wide eyed, fear filling her face. “I know its uncomfortable and the last thing you want to do. But I wont look and I wont touch. Just really quick okay.” She sniffles but nods her head slowly. I give her an encouraging smile and then as she works to her knees I drop my eyes to the floor. I hear the water moving and then a few seconds later she sits down again.