Drinking Coffee

retirement plans

JJ's POV
"What? From the FBI?" I asked. She nodded and I sat up. "Is everything ok?"

"Yes but Jen, I'm in my fifties. We are having a grandkid soon. I don't know if I can keep working." Damn that's true. I mean she's been working there for like 20 years.

"That makes sense. I'm gonna miss you at work." I said. "It will be a boring day. But I'll be right here at the end of the day." We both got comfortable and fell asleep.

When we went back to work Emily went right to Hotch's office. I saw them through the window and she was smiling. She ran out to me and kept smiling.

"I am officially retiring from the FBI."

She did all the paperwork and she was done in three months. It gave her time to train someone. We told the team and overall they were happy.

We had one last case together and we will be celebrating. Penelope got us a nice hotel room and it was amazing.

I ordered champagne to the room and she popped the cork.

"Here's to over 20 amazing years." She said holding a glass. I smiled. Honestly I hated it all.

I mean I'm glad she's doing something that makes her happy but I'm really gonna miss her. I mean I've spent almost everyday with her.

"What's wrong?" She whispered. Fuck.

"Nothing. I'm fine." I said with a smile. She raised an eyebrow and stood up. "I'm fine is basically a cry for help in JJ language."

I set my glass down and crossed my legs. "I just don't want to say goodbye. I mean I've spent almost every moment with you and now?" My voice kinda cracked and she sat next to me.

"I've always had you there. Anytime I was scared or terrified you would be there. We have a fucking scary job and I don't know how to do it alone." I kinda cried.

She held my head and I curled into a ball. "I'm sorry. I'm happy, I am. Let's just celebrate your retirement." I backed up and stood up.

"Jennifer, we can't move past this. We should talk about it." She tried saying but I pushed it off. "No. It isn't about me. We should be having a good night and I'm ruining it."

"You're not ruining anything. We should talk about it."
"Not tonight. Let's just call it a night and we can talk in the morning. Just not tonight." I said. I sat on the bed and she got under the covers.

I joined her and just fell asleep.

Emily's POV
As soon as I woke up JJ wasn't there. I got ready and went to see the team. I knocked on Penelope and Derek's door but they didn't answer.

I went to the other two rooms but still nothing. I tried calling JJ, Elle and Hotch but no one answered their phone. Penelope. She's the only one that might answer.

"Hey sweets, how ya feeling?" She asked.
"What? I just woke up. I'm fine."
"Oh. JJ said you were super sick and couldn't go.
"Go where Penelope?"
"We got a hit on the unsub. The team is heading there now. I called JJ but she said you weren't going."

Shit. I got the address and left immediately. Knowing JJ she went alone to prove she could do it. She wasn't picking up her phone and I hated it.

I met Hotch outside and he looked surprised to see me.

"Yeah I feel better. What's happening? Where's JJ?"
"She went inside with a team to catch the unsub."

I took an earpiece and got myself ready to go inside. I ran in with Hotch and we slowly went through the house.

JJ's POV
"Jennifer where the hell are you?" Emily said in my ear. "I found him. He's in the basement." I whispered. I followed him down the stairs and cornered him.

I yelled at him to stop and he turned around and aimed at me. Shit.

It's happening again. I'm freezing. I can't move, I can't breathe. I tried to say something but I was paralyzed. I could hear my heart beating but I couldn't do anything.

"Jennifer!" I heard from behind me. Hotch started talking to the unsub and soon started cuffing him.

"What the fuck?" Emily said. I still had my gun up and I couldn't move. "Jennifer why did you go in alone?"

She kept asking questions but I couldn't hear her voice. I just heard a ringing. "Jennifer?" She grabbed my hand and I fell to the floor.

I couldn't breathe but she held onto me as tight as she could.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." I cried. She just held my head and I dug my head into her neck. I couldn't stop shaking.

"We're ok. Everyone is ok." She whispered. I looked at her and couldn't stop talking.

"I'm sorry. I thought if I did this I would be ok by myself. But I was wrong. I couldn't move. I was paralyzed." I shook my head and she stopped me.

"I know. And we are all ok. Now let's get up and we can go back to the hotel." I shook my head and she slowly started getting up.

"I can't move. Emily I can't do it. I can't do this."
"I'll carry you. It'll be okay." She stood up and didn't let me go. She wrapped my arm around her neck and lifted me up.

She walked me to an SUV and I just sat and hugged my knees. She sat next to me and tried to get me to talk.

"Why'd you go in alone? I wasn't sick this morning and you know it." She stated. "I know. I just thought that if I did this alone I would be able to work without you. If I could catch him I didn't need you to be here."

"Jennifer just because I'm not there it doesn't mean you are alone. What you did was stupid and you know it."

"I know." I sobbed into my hands and couldn't stop. "I'm scared. I was a school psychologist and now I'm in the FBI? What the fuck am I doing here?"

"JJ..."

"I can't do it anymore. I have been shot and stabbed and beaten and I quit." I said. Emily tried to say something but I got out of the car. I went straight to Hotch.

"I quit. This is the last case I will do with the BAU." I stated. I don't think he could say anything. He said alright and I turned to get in the car.

"I think it was a good idea." Emily whispered. I put my head on her shoulder and held her hand. "We can spend time finding things to do. We'll be ok."