[The scene fades to Bag End in Hobbiton, where we met Bilbo earlier. Bilbo is in his study, writing in his book.]
[Bilbo:] "That, my dear Frodo, is where I come in. For quite by chance, and the will of a Wizard, fate decided I would become part of this tale. It began, well, it began as you might expect. In a hole in the ground, there lived a Hobbit. Not a nasty, dirty, wet hole, full of worms and oozy smells; this was a Hobbit-hole, and that means good food, a warm hearth, and all the comforts of home."
"See, you are coming with us.", Kili and Fili commented.
[Frodo, eating an apple, walks out of Bag End and picks up the mail from the mailbox. He returns inside and gives the mail to Bilbo. Bilbo, who was laughing while writing in his book, quickly quiets down as Frodo approaches him.]
"I still want to know who Frodo is.", Bilbo said. "Probably a future relative of yours, mr. Baggins. Maybe even your son.", Gloin said. "No, I don't think he's my son, master dwarf. And you can all call me Bilbo." "Than you can call me Gloin." Everyone else followed him and said that Bilbo could call them by their names too.
[Bilbo:] "Thank you."
[Frodo picks up the picture of a young Bilbo.]
[Frodo:] "What's this?"
[Bilbo grabs back the picture.]
[Bilbo:] "That is private. Keep your sticky paws off. It's not ready yet."
[Frodo:] "Not ready for what?"
[Bilbo:] "Reading."
[Frodo picks up and examines some old object of Bilbo's. Bilbo examines the pile of letters]
[Bilbo:] "What on earth are these?"
[Frodo:] "Replies to the party invitations."
[Bilbo:] "Oh! Good gracious! Is it today?"
"Not sure what party it is, but apparently you forgot.", Bofur said laughing. "Well it's not surprising, he is old.", Kili said. "Kili.", Thorin said warningly, not wanting Bilbo to be insulted when he's going with them on the journey.
[Frodo:] "They all said they're coming. Except for the Sackville-Bagginses; they're demanding you ask them in person."
[Bilbo:] "Are they, indeed? Over my dead body."
[Frodo:] "They'd probably find that quite agreeable! They seem to think you have tunnels overflowing with gold."
[Bilbo:] "It was one small chest, hardly overflowing. And it still smells of troll."
[Bilbo starts hiding his valuables in chests, jars, vases, and other inconspicuous places.]
[Frodo:] "What on earth are you doing?"
[Bilbo:] "Taking precautions. You know, I caught her making off with the silverware once."
[Frodo:] "Who?"
[Bilbo:] "Lobelia Sackville-Baggins. She had all my spoons stuffed in her pockets. Hah! Dreadful woman; make sure you keep an eye on her after I'm ... when I'm ... when I'm..."
[Frodo:] "When you're...what?"
[Bilbo:] "It's nothing. Nothing."
"Why does that sound like your planning to die?", Nori asked suspicious. "I'm sure it's only an precaution.", Bilbo said.
[Bilbo looks at some papers on a table.]
[Frodo:] "You know, some people are beginning to wonder about you, Uncle. They think you're becoming odd."
"Ah, so he's my nephew. But why is he living with me and not with his parents?", Bilbo wondered. I hate to say it, but there is a big chance that his parents are dead.", Dori said. Bilbo nodded, already suspecting something like that.
[Bilbo:] "Odd? Hmm."
[Frodo:] "Unsociable."
[Bilbo:] "Unsociable? Me? Nonsense. Be a good lad and put that on the gate."
[Bilbo hands Frodo a sign he's made; Frodo looks at it dubiously.]
[Going outside, Frodo nails the sign to the gate of Bag End. It says "NO ADMITTANCE EXCEPT ON PARTY BUSINESS." Bilbo comes outside and stretches.]
"Nice sign.", Fili said, chuckling.
[Frodo:] "You think he'll come?"
[Bilbo:] "Who?"
[Frodo:] "Gandalf."
"So, you are friends with him in the future.", Ori said. "Apparently.", Bilbo said.
[Bilbo:] "Ahhh. He wouldn't miss a chance to lit up his whiz-poppers! He'll give us quite a show, you'll see."
[Frodo:] "Alright then, I'm off."
[Bilbo:] "Off to where?"
[Frodo:] "East Farthing woods. I'm going to surprise him."
[Bilbo:] "Well, go on then! You don't want to be late."
"He'll act like he was never surprised.", Thorin said, always having found that irritating.
[As Frodo runs off, the camera pans over the Shire. Bilbo sits on a bench outside his door, smoking his pipe; he blows out a large smoke ring which floats into the sky.]
[Bilbo:] "He doesn't approve of being late. Not that I ever was. In those days, I was always on time. I was entirely respectable. And nothing unexpected ever happened."
And now I'm not anymore, Bilbo thought, hopefully it'll show why. Because he has no idea why he went. He was always so respectable.
