Somewhere Here on Earth

8

Sleeping well was something I hadn't done in a few days. Last night I had so much going through my head I think I slept maybe a couple of hours. If that. Prince slept wonderful, as I could hear him moaning and stirring in his sleep. It's been two weeks to the day since we've had sex and I knew eventually it would take a toll on him even if he didn't want to admit it. Maybe that's something I could talk with my counselor about today. I sat up slowly and stretched before Prince's arms suddenly wrapped around me and I tensed. When I tensed, he pulled away which he had been doing since all this started. I sighed and laid next to him and putting his arm around me. "I'm sorry." I whispered.

I knew he was trying to be respectful. Of course when anyone tenses you know they're uncomfortable. I was getting more comfortable with kissing him so I was slowly getting better, but I knew he was restraining himself from touching me like he used to. Prince was afraid I'd tense. In his sleep, he kissed my forehead letting his lips linger and he slid closer to me. "Good morning." I whispered to him. He smiled in his sleep and I nuzzled my forehead against his jaw. His hand rubbed my back soothingly and I slid closer to him, but that was the worst thing I could've done. I gasped and pulled away quick when something brushed my knee which caused him to sit up. "What's wrong?" He asked.

I swallowed hard in fear as I saw his hard on in his sweat pants which caused me jolt back. It brought the things I was trying to forget back. "Rozie...I'm sorry. I..." I ran out of the room and to the bathroom immediately feeling my hands shaking and my body trembling. For the rest of the morning, we didn't speak to each other and I felt like it was my fault. He couldn't read my mind and I didn't blame him for it. Prince was fully dressed and sitting at the dinner table staring into his tea with his hand on his cheek and a frown on his face. Shit, he probably thought I was mad at him.

Papi was at the front door waiting for me and I walked up to Prince. "Hey, you wanna come with us?" I asked him softly. He looked up at me confused as if he didn't know if I was speaking to him. Claude walked past me to join Papi and they walked outside. "You said you had some things to take care of today. I thought we could all go out and enjoy the day. I'd love it if you came with us. With me..." I watched his Adam's apple Bob as he swallowed and he stood up to push his chair in before walking towards the door. He was like a scolded puppy in the corner. He was hurt and I didn't mean to hurt him and I know he didn't mean to scare me.

Claude was driving us around and he and Papi were sharing laughs as Claude knew a bit of Spanish, but Prince and I were in the back of the car separated and not speaking. He had his legs crossed and was looking out of the window with his shades on. It was starting to snow very lightly and honestly I was getting sick of seeing it. Suddenly, Claude's phone began to ring and at a red light he looked at the caller ID. "Sir, it's for you." He said to Prince. Prince reached up and grabbed the phone. "Hello?....Oh, okay. When can it be delivered?....Well, I'd like it delivered today if you can. I'll pay extra....I'll be out most of the day so just set it up in the back room on the right, Key's under the mat.......Okay, bye." He hung up and handed Claude back his phone. It was so strange how his customer service voice sounded so cheerful and happy, but the way he looked was so sad and confused.

We arrived at the counselor's office and I turned to Prince as I was unbuckling my seatbelt. He was looking right at me through his shades and his hand was slowly reaching for his seatbelt button, but I don't think he knew if he was allowed to come in. "Come with me." I said to him. He unbuckled his seatbelt and we got out of the car, but I had to meet him on his side of the car. I took his hand and we walked inside behind Papi. Thankfully we were the first ones in today, so I was able to meet with my counselor as quickly as possible.

I let go of Prince's hand and turned to face him as we were sitting in the hallway. "I'm not sure what's going to happen in there, but I'm worried." I said to him. He leaned his shoulder against the wall not speaking. "Prince, what's wrong? You're not speaking to me." He shook his head and his bottom lip quivered. Was he about to cry? I had never not ONCE knowing this man ever seen him cry. "I-I'm sorry." He whispered. Was he more sensitive than I thought he was? "Why are you sorry? What's wrong?" I was whispering with him playing with the collar of his shirt. "I-I didn't mean to." His chest was shaking. It was like he was trying not to cry.