Scars [An Exclamation Point Fan Fiction]

PART 11

I'm sitting in my room, trying to take away the pain, when I look up and see Paul standing looking horrified at me. He walks over to my bed and sits by me. He takes the scissors from my hand.

"Give it back!" I yell climbing on him, to get the scissors.

"No!" He says backing away from me. "Why are you doing this to yourself?"

"Why does it matter?" I yell at him.

"Because I care too much about you, to let this happen!" He yells back.

I collapse onto my pillow and cry harder. Paul puts the scissors down and lays on the bed facing me. I crawl closer to him and lay my head on his chest.

"How long?" He asks.

"Since Nate started hitting me." I say. "It was the summer before our junior year started."

"Why?" He whispers.

"I was hurting. It was around the same time Brady started doing drugs. It was an escape for me."

"Does anyone know?"

"My best friend Lyle was suspicious, but he never said anything. I've never told anyone." I push away from Paul. I pull my shorts up higher, and take my jacket off showing my tanktop. I show him the scars on my shoulders towards my chest, my wrists, and my thighs. "I cut my wrists first, then started on my shoulders and moved to my thighs." I say as my voice breaks.

Paul sits up and gently takes my wrist. One hand travels the length of my arm, slowly tracing each scar. His other hand gently touches the scars on my legs. He leans forward and kisses each of my wrists, then he moves to my cheek before slowly kissing my forehead. He hesitates then leans his head towards mine so our foreheads touch. I look into his bright green eyes and put one hand on his cheek, and he leans closer before softly kissing my lips. I pull away and turn my face.

"Paul we can't." I say tears building up in my eyes. "You could get disqualified, and I could get sent home. It's not worth the risk."

"Nikki look at me." He says. I slowly look at him."I don't care. You mean more to me than this."

"But what about Danny? I don't think he'd feel the same."

Paul sighs, then lays back on the bed. I lay down next to him and put my head on his chest. We lay there for a few minutes. I turn my head and put my ear to his chest, listening to his heart beat. Paul pulls my chin up so I'm looking at him. reach up and run my fingers through his hair. Before I know what I'm doing, I lean up and slowly press my lips to his. This time neither of us pull back. He responds to my kiss and pulls me closer to him. We break apart after a minute and look at each other. He smiles at me and I start to blush.

"I love it when you blush." He says. "You look so innocent when you do." I smile up at him. "What are we going to do?" He asks brushing hair behind my ear. "You know I'm crazy about you. And I hope you feel the same way."

"I do." I say taking the hand he placed on my cheek, entwining our fingers. "I just don't want anything to happen to you and Danny."

"It could be our secret." He says.

"Sounds good." I whisper leaning up to kiss him.

Paul and I manage to keep our realtionship a secret for a couple days before Danny caught us kissing in their room. Live shows for week four come up. The theme is "Unplugged." I'm standing backstae with Paul before they go on.

"Tell me what song you're doing." I beg.

"No it's a surprise." He says winking at me. I frown and cross my arms to my chest. "You're cute when you pout." He says grabbing my waist and pulling me closer. I put my hands on his chest and push him away.

"Paul stop. You know we can't" I say.

Paul takes my hand and leads me to an empty hallway. "No one will see us here." He says nuzzling myneck before softly kissing it. I let out a tiny giggle.

"Stop it." I say through giggles.

Paul leans up and puts both hands on my waist. He pulls me closer as I put my hands around his neck. He leans his head towards my ear. "I think I need some thing for good luck." He whispers. I feel his breath on my neck and it sends shivers down my spine. I put my hands on either side of his face and pull him so he's looking at me. I lean forward slowly and softly kissing his lips. I pull away and lean towards his ear. "Good luck." I whisper.

"Danny! Paul!" A voice yells. "You're up next!"

Paul plants a quick kiss then walks back toward the stage. The video plays of their rehearsal this week. Danny starts talking about the song they chose. "It's dedicated someone very special to us." He says as the video ends. The stage lights up. Danny sits with his guitar and Paul sits next to him holding a mic. Danny starts playing. Paul lifts the mic and starts singing, "If the heart is always searching, can you ever find a home? I've been looking for that someone. I'll never make it on my own." My hand goes to my mouth as Danny sings. The day we started our relationship, Paul lay in my bed holding me, softly singing me this song. Paul is singing again. "More and more I start to realize I can reach my tomorrow I can hold my head up high, and it's all because you're by my side." They finish out the song and get a standing ovation from the judges. They get great comments on the emotion they showed. I walk back to the hallway Paul and I were just standing moments before. I close my eyes smiling to myself.

"Nikki. There you are." A voice says. I open my eyes. My heart starts pounding harder.