Worthy

Part 18 - I Don't Understand

*FLASHBACK - 3 years ago*

It had been six months since the battle for New York; you and the team had been working tirelessly on helping rebuild the city, whilst also building up friendships within the team itself. Even though you were exhausted every single night you would venture out to the roof of the new Avengers compound; simply to watch the stars - and think of Thor.

You hadn't seen him since that day; the memories of holding him in your arms as he died had revisited your dreams often. But what really stuck in your memory was that gentle kiss that had left so much unspoken between you. Reliving the thought, you touch your lips, lighting up a smile on your face, a shiver running down your spine. It had been so quick, so brief, but had left you wanting more. A cool breeze surrounds the compound, making you wrap your arms around yourself. "Five more minutes, then I'll go back in."

As if by magic a star shoots through the sky - you instantly follow its trajectory, making you stand and turn to keep sight of it. You're almost completely distracted by its presence you don't sense the arrival of another person on the roof beside you. As they gently tap you on your shoulder, you jump and instantly lash out - catching whoever it was with a sharp punch to the face.

"Thor!" You exclaim when you finally understand that it's him. "Holy shit, you scared me!" It takes you a minute to comprehend he's actually there standing in front of you, as he simply rubs his chin, before you finally run up to him; desperate to give him a hug.

A hand nearly collides with your face as he puts a hand up to stop you. "I don't think so, not after that performance," he stammers out, still rubbing his chin slightly.

"Like I said," you blush, still trying to make your way closer to him. "You scared me." You can't help but laugh due to the nerves now that he's standing there in front of you, waiting for his usual stupid laugh before he gives you a tight hug; but there's something different about him, and not just because he's dressed head to toe in his Asgardian clothing. His whole demeanour has changed. "What's wrong?"

"Why would anything be wrong?" He questions, gently pacing the roof; never looking directly at you. "I just thought I should come back and clear up a few things before I take my rightful place back in Asgard."

"Loki," you sigh. "Did you stop him?"

"Yes," he gives a big smile while looking up at the sky. "You need not worry about my brother ever again." You can't help but feel concerned about the grin etched on Thor's face; it felt so unnatural for him to be this pleased about his brother's defeat. "In fact, you need not worry about either of us for some time." His eyes finally meet yours, but the warmth that usually accompanied that look was long gone.

"What do you mean?" You once again take a step towards him; while he remains rigid and unwavering in his stance, making you freeze once again.

"I am returning to Asgard to take what is rightfully mine," He turns slightly, looking over the grounds the compound is sitting on. "The throne." He embellishes. "Needless to say this dalliance of ours must also come to an end." He looks back toward you.

"I don't understand..."

He lets out a throaty laugh. "Of course you don't." Thor takes a step towards the edge of the roof, sighing. "It's simple Kate, like you." He bends down and picks up a stone and throws it off into the woods. "While this was fun, you had to realise that we would never truly be together." He scoffs. "An Asgardian king with a small minded Midgardian would never be accepted."

A weight pulls in your stomach as you struggle to comprehend his words, along with the tone of them: ice cold, this was not the Thor you had known for the better part of a year. Not your friend, not the man you had completely fallen for. But here he was, standing right in front of you. What had changed?

Wrapping an arm around yourself to try and soften the blow, you look up at him, fighting back the tears that are creeping at your eyes. "I don't believe you," you whisper, but he still heard you, making him snort, derisively.

"Believe me," he growls, so loudly you're sure that someone will hear in the building. "You were a distraction while I was exiled here. Now that I've been welcomed back with open arms, where I belong, I have no need for you or this realm." He spits out, gesturing around him.

"What about the team?" You bark out. "What about the Avengers?"

"Whenever you lesser mortals need my help then I will be glad to assist. A king should always have close allies nearby." He shrugs, making your blood turn to ice as you finally understand how little you actually meant to him.

"And what about what you promised me?" You shout, not caring now whether someone will hear. He looks at you with a look of surprised mixed with confusion. "You promised me you would look for my brother? That you would find out the truth for me?" Letting the pain turn into anger, you step towards him and look up into his eyes, determined not to give in just yet. "You're dying words were that you could have loved me? What changed your mind so quickly? Did I really mean that little to you?" You whisper, once again fighting back tears as all he gives you is a blank stare.

Thor pauses, keeping eye contact with you, his facial expression not changing once. "The troubles of a simple Midgardian are not the worries of a true god." He places a hand on your shoulder, sending a wave of repulsion through your body, making you push him as hard as you can, before throwing a punch at his face, which this time he manages to block.

You don't care anymore; letting out a barrage of punches to him, most of which he ignores or simply doesn't affect the great god of thunder. Just as you begin to tire yourself out, the tears start to flood your face, making your frustration intensify. You try to land one more hit, but Thor grabs both your wrists, stopping you. You almost fall to the floor in exhaustion and heartbreak.

"You're making a fool out of yourself Kate," he says softly, but still with a twinge of condescension. He lets go of you and starts to walk away.

"I hope the throne is worth it," you shout out between sobs as his footsteps echo across the roof.

"It will be," is the reply, but you don't turn to look at him. "Don't be petty just because you weren't." Those last words sting more than he can ever know. Familiar feelings from your past creep over and finally you drop to your knees, tears falling.

Thor takes one last look over at you, watching your back as it shudders from the force of your sobs. At first his face is void of emotion, before a gentle smile takes over, turning into a menacing grin; a bright green light unravels over his body to show Loki standing in Thor's place, smile growing wider.

But you don't notice the God of Mischief sneering at you; laughing to himself as he disappears, while you try to compose yourself, but failing, simply letting the tears drop onto the ground. You look up to the stars one last time, hoping to gain comfort from them, just as you had done minutes ago; but nothing comes, just more pain.