15 going on 30(Stand By me)

017

TW: THOUGHTS OF SH

"Goodnight Gordie" I say walking in my house.

"Night Lila" He says walking away frim my driveway.

I walk in my house to no one home. Not a soul. No trace of anyone, it was dark and cold, there was a single wine glass on the counter. Underneath had been a note.

Lila, i'll be back soon, don't get pregnant. DONT be stupid.

I knew it was from my mother by the sloppy left hand writing.

I sighed and than went to the fridge and grabbed a wine bottle, and a new glass.

"Fuck me" I said going to my room.

I closed the door and screamed.

I screamed because of Chris.

And because of my mom.

And because of everything that's happened in my stupid life.

What if i would be better off- dead.

No. I thought.

I need to be here, people care about me.

What am i think- who cares about me; Lila, daughter of the slut and the beater. Sister of jail bird Ben.

What if i just ended it.

"What if.." I whispered.

No. i have things to do.

Places to see.

People to fuck.

No.

But what if.

A knock at the door.

"fuck" I said.

walk over. turn the handle. and open the door.

Chris.

There stood Chris.

Sweating.

I almost closed the door but he caught it.

"Lila.." He said quietly.

"Go home Chris"

"No- please listen; i have a good explanation it's not what it looked like"

"What we're you fucking her for kicks?"

"N-What no.. i was desperate"

"Chris get out of my house"

I didn't even realize he was in my house if we were being honest.

I was so focused on how mad i was. on him even being here.

"GET OUT OF MY GODDAMN HOUSE" I yelled.

Chris flinched a little.

"Chris you fucked a girl, big deal, don't lie about it, that's all i ask. Oh and for you to go home" I said.

Chris looked like he was ready to defend himself.

But ultimately ended up just walking out the door.

Hands in his pocket, head down.

I screamed.

I let it all out.

All the frustration.

The anger.

The pain.

I let it out.

I didn't care if a neighbor heard.

What i really wanted to do was go punch Chris right in the nose.

Make him bleed.

But i won't.

No because i'm scared.

But because he doesn't deserve anything frim me.

I might be over reacting i might.