Like Calls to Like: a Darklina soulmates + Political marrage AU

The Darkling

Alina rests in her bed, such a small thing among the sea of blankets. Her white hair is strewn about and her eyes are closed. On her right wrist is the fetter of scales she wears, and on her left is a ring of the tracker's bones. The collar sits on her neck. I briefly touch the circlet of bone on my left ring finger. 

She looks as she did before, if not for the effects of my using Merzost on her as the battle ended. The skin around her Amplifiers is the color of ash, and slate-colored veins surround her eyes. I feel a small, weak trickle of something, perhaps remorse, for doing it to her, for taking away her ability to call sunlight, but it is a small price to pay for ending her and the tracker's soulmate bond.

I consider what would happen if I lay down next to her, brush the hair from her forehead, if I could stay and comfort her, protect her from loss. Before, had she joined me willingly, had Baghra (the traitorous whore) not ruined it, I might have.  But now she was in chains and I held the key, and we could not touch, not even with what was to come.

A knock on the door distracts me from my thoughts- if one can call them that, for thoughts are words of the mind, and I had been speaking with my heart.

"Enter" I call, and a red-clad corporalnik, a heartrender, enters the room. He glances at me before resting his hands on Alina's chest, making her heart beat faster and bringing her near consciousness.

"She should wake up in a matter of minutes- sir." States the heartrender, nearly a boy.

"Good. You may leave."

I stare after him until the door is shut tightly and a small groan escapes Alina's lips. I turn to face her, burying my eagerness to see her warm, brown eyes blink open. At first, she looks sleepy and confused, softening her features and making the urge to touch her almost impossible to resist. Then, her face hardens into a mask of hate, and another, deeper, pang of regret hits me.

I don't know if I will ever understand what this grisha- no, this Okazat'sya girl does to me, but it's obvious I don't do the same for her. 

"You." She spits, her eyes full of sadness along with her anger. "Where is he? What have you done to us?!"

Us. A simple word, often used between soulmates to describe the other. The word is simple, one syllable, two letters, yet it pains me more than a knife wound. I turn my features to a blank mask that reveals nothing.

"Your tracker is dead, and you killed him." I spit the words, ignoring the way Alina looks as if she's been slapped, ignoring the tears spilling over her cheeks. I can't ignore the hurt that once again laces through my soul, and I worry- but no. I push aside the matter. My soulmate was killed years ago. It was only through Merzost that I managed to sever our link and save myself, as I have done with Alina.

"But- how-?" Her curiosity overpowers her anger, though Alina looks as if she regrets asking.

"Merzost can do many impossible things, even severing the link between soulmates."

Alina looks as if she's frozen, or maybe as if she can't believe what she's hearing. "Why... why save me?" She finally asks.

I pause, unsure of what to say. Words rise unbidden to the forefront of my mind. Because I couldn't lose you. Because you make me feel human. Because you are amazing. I know I can't say any of those, so instead I simply answer "You are a very valuable asset, Alina Starkov."

She shakes her head. "No, I will never help you, I will never serve you, I will fight you-" Her voice breaks, and fresh tears stream down her cheeks. "I will fight you, every day, for as long as I live, until- until one of us is d- dead."

I smile at her, a cold thing, like a snake staring down at a trapped mouse. "I don't think that would be possible. You see, according to everyone except for you, me, and a few of my grisha, you admitted to being held captive after you were 'kidnapped' from the Little Palace. During the battle on the Fold, I helped you destroy it and kill your captors. Afterwards, you spent two weeks in seclusion, though rumor has it you are courting the King of Ravka. This will be proven true in three days at the wedding."

Alina stares at me, and I know she is connecting the dots, realizing what I'm saying.

"N- no! I will not accept your proposal what about-" Mal. The tracker's name goes unsaid, but I know he is at the forefront of her mind.

"Impossible, since you have already accepted." Alina stares at me, mouth hanging open. I know I have violated her, but I refuse to allow myself to care- because this had to be done.

I turn away, leaving the room. I can't stand to be here, with this woman who tugs at my heart in a way no one has since Anaya. I barely know what to think, but I do know that keeping Alina close to me will be my ruination.