Claire Riddle

Chapter 6

"HARRY POTTER!?" 

Claire walked with grace and quietly reached the Slytherin table, everyone was whispering. She sighed softly while Dumbledore exclaimed things and waited for the commotion to subdue. She didn't need to ask anyone what had happened. She knew. She saw. Unlike some people Claire was one of those few who didn't directly ask but saw and noticed. She saw the piece of paper fall into Dumbledore's hand, she knew that today was going to be the day they announced the champions but what she felt? No, she herself did not know. She didn't like that feeling. She masked it. She hid it from the world. She didn't want to seem vulnerable. 

Claire Marvolo Gaunt Slytherin was described as a bully by the Hufflepuffs but they of course knew and thought of her as Claire Malfoy as did the others. She was called powerful and intelligent, a mixture of book smart and street smart by the Ravenclaws something the all wanted to be, yet they hated what she did to the people who crossed her. 

The Gryffindors didn't like her. In fact they loathed her, she was a bully in their eyes, any Slytherin was. The Gryffindors didn't pick a fight with her because they knew. Knew that they would lose and be taunted by all the other Slytherins forever, they took pride in being brave but in facing Claire Malfoy? Everyone chickened out. 

The Slytherins themselves looked up to her, she was everything their pureblood parents wanted them to be. Perfect. 

Draco. Draco Malfoy looked at her and saw the girl who was happily playing with him in the Malfoy garden with their house elf Dobby when his parents called her in. After that she was never the same. She was cold, they still played but she always tried to perform accidental magic. Always. And she succeeded. They were fraternal twins, but there was something off about that. As if it were a lie? Draco wanted to uncover that mystery, a mystery he should've uncovered years ago.

Claire. She knew what everyone thought of her, from her peers to her teachers but one thing she did not know is what she thought of herself. She knew she was powerful, she knew she was smart, she knew she would achieve greatness. But who was she? 

Claire Riddle buried all her emotions and feelings. When she wanted to express something or say something, she'd be distant and rude. She wanted to meet her father desperately, but she didn't want it to show. Smiling was for losers, crying was for the weak and she was not, oh no she wasn't weak. Claire Riddle was a bully, she used people like Reanna to do things for her like getting a basilisk fang and more. She collected things, you never know when you'd need powerful items. She was tactful and manipulative, all the qualities of a Slytherin. She was ambitious and showed no mercy.

So why? Why? Why did she feel... Worried for Harry Potter. She didn't care. She hated him. He made her something he himself was. An orphan. 

She didn't know why she wanted to smile whenever she was with Reanna Troy. 

And that's why she was scared. She was scared of what she was feeling. She was scared of feeling anything. She was scared of letting people in. She was scared of showing them she wasn't perfect. She was scared of not knowing things, she was scared. She hated all her feelings, she hated her emotions she hated everyone that made her feel anything. But the funny thing was she didn't mind feeling happy when she jinxed someone, that smirk was a smile in disguise, she didn't mind feeling hatred towards someone like Pansy Parkinson.

So she laid out her Green Slytherin notebook and wrote her emotions. She needed to work on her masking a bit more. 

- Scared

Wrote Claire with a shaky hand. Drop.

- Angry

She was angry with herself, how could she feel something, how could she feel anything? How dare she let herself? Drop.

- Frustrated

Drop. Drop.

- S̶ ̶  S̶ ̶  S̶a̶d̶?

She wrote it. She crossed it. The tears were falling. Drop. Drop Drop. How could she let herself feel? She swore she wouldn't. How dare she let herself feel? Sadness was a weakness. Anger was okay as long as she didn't show it. Frustrated was feeling she didn't get unless she failed. Which she almost never did. And when she did, she had things she could do to herself. She needed to punish herself. 

So. She shakily, trying to keep her tears in. Left and walked up the stairs almost slipping because of missing a step and reached the Room of Requirement. 

She practiced the wand movements carefully. Her father must've used this spell. Just not on himself. 

She got out the dummy in the back area. This time the room had give her a blackboard and a dummy figure which was placed behind the blackboard. She got it out, it's wheels creaking but she didn't care, she practiced it on the it and watched as her verbal spell hit it. The red beam reminding her of blood. It was made of wood therefore nothing happened to it except it disintegrating. But she knew what would happen to her. She was aware and she knew she deserved it. So she pointed her wand at herself and firmly said— 

"Crucio!"