Symphony Of Lies (Inked Hearts 2)

14

AN:
Thank you everyone for the 500 reads!! This is a long one, so buckle up guys!

This chapter is dedicated to @imtooswag4this for making me laugh 💜

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Margot first person pov:

His eyes, full of confusion, hurt, joy, expectation. His blush lips that were turned down in a sad frown though they longed to turn up into a smile. His swept hair that looked like it held the winds that blew over oceans in it. His hands that looked like a young foal, begging to prance and race toward mine. His right hand and ring finger that held the identical tattoo to mine.

Him.

-

He found me, he found me, he found me.

He's seen me and seen my tattoo. He knows what I look like. He knows the woman who knows my friend who knows me. He could find me again. He looked like he wanted me, like he would try to find me again.

He found me, he found me, he found me.

My soulmate has found me.

-

I heave up nothing and choke on air. I can't breathe, can't sleep, can't eat or drink though I can feel my body longing for some sort of food or drink, I can't do anything but tremble on the floor of Beth's bathroom.

Crouching on the tiled floor, I flush the toilet again and resist the urge to lean back against the wall; having anything touch my back makes nausea worse for me. It's one of the reasons I don't like to have people around me when I'm sick; I can't have people touch me.

He'll be looking for me. He'll be wondering where I am.

But now I don't know which "he" I'm thinking of and it makes me want to throw up again.

I have a boyfriend, and I have a soulmate, and they are not the same person.

They'll both be looking for me now. And though Beth and Mayla said I can stay here as long as I want, I know that it isn't a good long-term plan.

He'll realize where I've gone and come for me, he always finds me.

And up until now, I've dismissed the disappointment and resentment when my boyfriend does find me, pushed away the urge to scream "leave me alone." and tried to be grateful that I have someone who cares about me at all.

But now it's something that I can no longer ignore. Because the truth is, I don't want him to find me. I don't want either of them to find me. The truth is, I don't know who me is. And while my boyfriend will come up with a long list of things to describe me, I'm starting to realize that the person he thinks I am, the person he wants me to be, just simply isn't real. And as for my- my soulmate, he doesn't know me at all.

And he deserves better than me. He deserves someone who can truly love and appreciate him. He deserves things that I can't give him.

I think back to the café, how I left without a word, how hurt he looked. I did that. I hurt him. And I'll hurt him more if I stay.

I can't stay here anymore. Not in Mayla and Beth's apartment, not in this city, not in this life.

I can't do this anymore.

Again, his face flashes in my head and I instinctively close my eyes to savor the memory. I've been running from him for as long as I can remember, hiding from the soulmate that I could feel was searching for me.

And I can't change overnight for him. I can't stay here for him or even stay in his life. But amongst everything he deserves in life, everything in a soulmate that I can't give, I can give him a goodbye.