Hang In There, Buddy!

Reviving My Once Buried Self - Esteem

I'm a simple girl believing that I possess no talent at all that is why if someone asks me if what talent can I share to everyone else, I would fell into deafening silence and stand there awkwardly-fidgeting. This question seems to trigger something from my past; 7-years old me standing in front of my father, closing my eyes and clenching my tiny fist as if holding a microphone while singing my heart out.

As I opened my eyes I felt warm liquid streaming from it and the heaviness in my chest is unbearable-remembering that wonderful childhood memory of mine leads me to the idea that I indeed HAVE a talent it's just that I'm afraid to share it since every one of them knew that I am talentless.

Just as I have decided to show my talent in our performance task-wearing a loose shirt, shaggy pants and sneakers while my hair is in a high ponytail-one of my acquaintance announces that lots of people from different section also want to share their respective talents and to perform with us and she added "as much as possible, please execute your talents without any mistakes."

I didn't know that my cold and trembling hands can get even colder than before by hearing the word "MISTAKES" because I knew in myself that I have a higher chance of making mistakes than performing well.

Someone-namely Belinda who's fetish is to mocked me-interrupted my internal conflict by nudging me and telling me that
"𝑨𝒔 𝒂 𝒕𝒂𝒍𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒍𝒆𝒔𝒔 𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒂 𝒇𝒊𝒓𝒔𝒕 𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒆 𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒎𝒆𝒓, 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒏𝒆𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒆𝒇𝒖𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒆𝒙𝒂𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒆𝒒𝒖𝒊𝒑𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒘𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒖𝒔𝒆, 𝒚𝒐𝒖'𝒍𝒍 𝒏𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒘𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒃𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒄𝒂𝒖𝒔𝒆𝒅 𝒐𝒇 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒈𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒔𝒕 𝒅𝒐𝒘𝒏𝒇𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒃𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒍𝒂𝒖𝒈𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒄𝒌 𝒐𝒇 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒐𝒏𝒆." she shrugs

My anxiousness intensifies as I heard my name being called to perform whatever talent I have-totally forgetting belinda's suspicious warning. Upon entering the room, my body feels so numb and I just stand in front immobile until someone cleared his throat as if awakening me from my reverie.

I closed my eyes and imagined my 7-years old self, singing in front of my beloved father without minding anyone and anything as I start opening my mouth to sing my heart out. Just as I was closed to the ending of my performance, I quickly open my eyes dumbfounded as I realize that my microphone and minus one is not functioning halfway through my performance without me even noticing it because I was so fascinated singing my best. Nevertheless, I still continue singing and pouring my emotions through a cappella.

Although this was not what I was expecting to be the outcome of my performance, I was happy and relieved that finally I was able to show my talent despite of some malfunction that occurred.

I bowed my head and raised them immediately after hearing a loud applause and words of praise like how creative and brave I was to continue my performance despite what happened in the middle of it. I expressed my gratitude to them and proceeded to exit the room while grinning widely.

Before I could finally get out of the room, I bumped into belinda who's shooting daggers at me. Because of her expression, I already have a hunch as to who's behind what happened in the middle of my performance.

But instead of getting angry and confronting her, I just smiled and said the words, "𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝒅𝒆𝒔𝒊𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒅𝒐 𝒆𝒗𝒊𝒍 𝒅𝒆𝒆𝒅𝒔 𝒕𝒐 𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒔 𝒘𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒃𝒆𝒏𝒆𝒇𝒊𝒕 𝒐𝒓 𝒅𝒐 𝒖𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒚 𝒈𝒐𝒐𝒅, 𝒘𝒆 𝒎𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒏 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒃𝒆 𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒚 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒖𝒄𝒄𝒆𝒔𝒔 𝒐𝒇 𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒔... 𝑰𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒚, 𝒘𝒆 𝒘𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒊𝒎𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒗𝒆𝒔. 𝑺𝒕𝒐𝒑 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒄𝒓𝒂𝒃 𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚, 𝑩𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒅𝒂. 𝑮𝒓𝒐𝒘 𝒖𝒑!" and I walked out from her sight.

Finally, I can say that I have already revived my once buried self-esteem and now, I'll make sure not to let anyone or anything to hinder me from showing these precious talent of mine-I will never let them rob this confidence from me again...

T.H.E E.N.D

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Thank you for reading this. I hope that it inspires, entertains and uplift you!☺️

- chiieeeDPurpleGirl✨💜