· this terrene, so aphotic. my voice unduly too thin. will it even reach the perpetrators or will it be buried within?
i, revel in my convoluted, never particularly welcomed but occasional darkness here,
as i take path d...
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I covet what She has,
The perfect smile and the most
appropriate attire.
While I lay slumped, posing as a liar.
Why does She get to be wild,
When all I ever do is comply to my inner
wounded child?
Why does She get a second chance,
When I look to an absent figure in mere
askance.
Only to discover mere air rife with
unduly resentment,
Why does She get to enjoy life with her
friends upto her heart's contentment?
That withdrawn look in Her eyes didn't
stay beyond my reach.
Then why does she rejoice in disguise
and I roam around with an open wound,
Is there any good for which I preach?
Did it not hurt when he rejected you?
When he undermined your being and
abandoned you?
Then tell me why do you still make the
blunder to see the best in everyone?
You loved and lived and I haven't even
begun.
I envy your poise, despise your cloak of
make believe peace,
Envious how you make others laugh and
obscure your agony with such ease.
The girl who clutches onto her sanity
with everything within,
The one who doesn't let it show but cries
herself to sleep.
Why does She seem so far ahead of a
healing process,
For I am a mere foul clutter of unloved
remains.
Her damp pillow screams for a hand as
She shakes another,
make up touched up far too many times
but she got tougher.
When I turned to the little shiny pills to
cope,
When there was clearly no hope,
How does She get the courage to stir, to
be altruistic and not just mope?
For I feel it to be the superior option,
To wallow,
to sob for the lost times,
To relish the unfavored with only so
much caution.
Mama said it's not nice to be jealous,
But she never wanted me, expressed so
heartily,
How to be a recluse, caused such a
wreckage wordlessly.
So, in all truth, what does she know?
When had a drowning rat ever been
victorious in saving another?
Just a tough row to hoe,
Is it too late to take my first flight with a
broken feather?
Then there's Her who took turns
paragliding,
Broke free from the guilded cage with
not a single wing.
When you stay so warm, so collected
when do you relieve?
Lord said you are me, just from a
different week but I've never been the
one to believe.
_______________ 22/12/2021
p/n
um..somehow I'm #4 in the poetry section and lemme JUST SAY THAT I SCREAMED. I MEAN, WHAT IN THE WORLD, wattpad? my imposter syndrome is gyrating rn XD nevertheless, A BIG THANK YOU YOU SHOWSTOPPING QUEENS/KINGS/THE ALMIGHTY NONBINARIES!!! I'm so utterly grateful, this is fucking crazy, but let's pretend I'm gonna get any sleep tonight with this much adrenaline
__ pls vote, I'd highly appreciated it :)
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