The Affair

45. New beginnings

'Um that is completely incorrect' He said

'Um, no its not' I challenged him.

'I think I would know, Love' He smirked. 

'But I read into it, I swear I'm correct.. The DNA has died out over thousands of years'

'Not entirely. At least 2% of some East Asian and Caucasian populations have neanderthal DNA, I guarantee it' I squinted in slight irritation that he may actual be right. He just stared at me and smiled. That gorgeous smile. 

'Whatever' He laughed

'You're so cute when you're irritated' He continued to laugh lightly. 'You know you can't know everything' He teased. 

'You act like you do'

'Thats because I do know everything' There was a brief silence 'Your second year of this course and you didn't even know that' He laughed. I grabbed my textbook and lightly smacked him arm, flirtatiously, of course. 'Rude' He stood up with his coffee and draped his bag over his shoulder. 'Ive got to run. Ill see you later' 

'Yeah. Thanks again for the tutor lesson' I smiled cheekily. 

'Anytime' He winked before he walked off. God I hate when he winks at me. It gives me weird butterflies. Why am I feeling like this around him. I think I get off on professors, honestly, its embarrassing. It doesn't help the fact that every time I get these butterflies, it reminds me that HE used to make me feel this way. I decided to stop saying his name as a way to get over him.. Its not working. 

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Dear Diary 

I bet you're wondering if he has contacted me since everything went to poo's. He hasn't. I don't know if I'm more upset about the fact he hasn't. I kind of thought he would,  if I'm honest. Do I wish he did? Or does. I don't know. I don't know if it would make things worse. Would it? I wonder if he still thinks about me, if he's still upset, if he's moved on, if he's forgotten about me. I sometimes find myself flighting with my thoughts about contacting him. I still haven't gotten the 'closure' I was after. Do people even need closure? I guess thats why I'm sitting in this room by myself writing about him still, even months laters. 

Maybe one day it will flick off like a switch and he will escape my mind for good. 

*BZZZZZZ* 

The doors intercom buzzed. 

'Hello?' 

'Farohs Furniture Delivery Ma'am' Ohh my new furniture is finally here! I ended up getting a few new items to spice up the place. Alex, I mean, he kept basically everything when I moved out. As he should, he bought pretty much everything. The hardest thing was leaving my dream car. He insisted I keep it, but I couldn't. No way. It would have made things harder for me, I think. I miss my baby stingray but I will purchase one for myself and restore it, one day. 

'Oh thank you so much. The couch can just go here please.. The new TV will go here, if you can just help me move this one to the bedroom, that would be great' 

'No worries' 

Im so happy with the new changes. It look more like my aesthetic now. The apartment is full of plants as well, which I love. Candles everywhere and the place smells amazing all the time. Ive still got mums table, of course. 

'Heyy' I turned to the door. It was Maddie. 'Brought your mail in' 

'Oh thank you!' 

'Oh my god, this couch is amazing. Dude, it looks so comfy!' 

'I know!' I said with excitement.

'The tv is huge!' She squealed. 

'75inch baby' I bragged.

'Movie nights are going to be so good' Maddie and I have been spending so much time together ever since we broke up. I admitted to spending more time with him than I did with her but she was never concerned about it, she was extremely understanding. Plus, she likes my apartment much better than hers. 

'All done, just need a signature' 

'Thank you so much for that' I said sweetly as I signed the paper. 'Have a good one' I closed the door behind them. 

'So.. Where were you yesterday?' 

'What do you mean? I was at uni'

'Until 7pm?' She raised her eyebrow 'You were with Musky Matt weren't you' 

'Maddie, don't call him that, its weird' She laughed. Even though its a perfect way to describe him. She watched me, waiting for an answer.

'Oh my god, you cheeky girl' She hung her jaw

'What?' I rolled my eyes 'We studied' I confessed

'Oh yeah studied with your lecturer, sure' 

'We had a break at the same time and.. we.. hung out, had coffee' 

'You two are so going to do it' 

'Maddie!' She laughed 

'You don't "study" with your professor until 7pm for no reason, Avery' 

'I was actually at the library, I have like, 3 essays due. He kept me company' 

'You love him' 

'I do not!' She winked at me 'I don't!' She nodded in disbelief 'Do I think he's attractive.. Yes.. Will I act on it.. I don't think so' She laughed

'You will eventually. Or should I take a peek in your diary and find out myself'

'You wouldn't... You don't even know where i-'

'Under your pillow, obviously' 

'You wouldn't' She laughed

'You're right, I wouldn't, but you will give in to that fire that burns in your loins for him' 

'MADDIE!' 

______________________________________________________

I walked to the kitchen to make myself a cup of tea before shutting off for the night. Im so glad I don't have classes tomorrow, I need a break. And I promised myself I will not study. I need a day to just not think about my classes. Ive been working like crazy. I noticed the mail on the bench, which I still hadn't opened.

Bills.. Bills.. Junk... A letter? I opened the envelope and began reading.

Avery,

I didn't know how else to reach out. I just need to know if you're doing well. How are you coping with university? Your apartment? I really hope you're doing well. I miss you. Im sorry for the hurt I've caused you. 

I will be coming into town on the 12th and I really hope you can find it in you to meet with me. Just so we can talk and I can see your face. There is something I would really love to talk to you about. My address is on the bottom. If you don't respond, Ill take it as a 'no'. 

Love you. - Dad

Wow. I don't even know how to consolidate that.