Helluva Boss x Reader Oneshots: Vol. 2

Blitzø x Female Reader: Swapped

"Excuse me Loona, have you seen Blitzø? He promised we would go over the new assignment system I came up with." Moxxie questioned the hellhound, sighing in frustration as her attention was on her phone.

"Relax Fatty, I heard you. And no, I haven't seen him since last night. It was a full moon after all, you can take a wild guess as to where he was."

"Ah, of course. He needs to stop doing this--Gah!" Loona jumped at the sudden shout, looking up from her device to see a portal had opened above him...along with Blitzø who had landed on top of him.

"Hm, at least you're wearing underwear this time." she chuckled as he picked himself up.

"Don't start with me Loona, I had a rough morning. And sorry Mox, Stella nearly walked in--Oof!" He nearly stumbled over his employee as the rest of his clothes were tossed to him "A f***ing warning would've been nice--Whoa!" What really made him hit the floor was having to catch the prince's grimoire.

"So sorry Blitzy, I didn't want to risk getting caught this time. Stella is not in the best mood right now."

"When is she ever in a good mood?! You owe me for this!"

"I know, but I do hope you have a good day at work. I'll see you on the next full moon darling.~" he winked, blowing him a kiss before the portal closed.

"Ugh, if he wasn't a good lay I swear..." he muttered to himself as he got dressed.

"Sir, this is really starting to get out of hand." Moxxie groaned as he stood, cracking his back "These close calls with his wife are getting even closer if you haven't noticed."

"We got it under control Mox, don't get your tail in a twist." Blitzø dismissed his comment, irritating him as usual.

"Why don't you do the smart thing and meet the guy at a hotel instead?" Loona asked.

"Because his precious library is in that damn castle. Which is why he insists on..." He suddenly paused, quickly stepping aside as Millie fell from a portal into her husband's arms.

"Millie?!"

"Phew, don't fret hun, I'm fine...can't say the same for (Y/N) though." she replied, worriedly looking up at the portal.

"So where is--Oof!" You suddenly came flying through the portal, colliding head first into your boss before it closed.

"Ouch, talk about a rough landing..." you groaned as you sat up. Before you could rub the new bruise on your head, Blitzø was quick to push you to the side with an irritated growl.

"How many times am I gonna be knocked over by something falling out of a damn portal today?!"

"Hey, I was being chased! I ended up setting off an alarm and the cops showed up! Maybe if you spent a day or 2 out in the field, you would understand the shit I go through for your lazy ass!" you argued, dusting off your clothes.

"And here it comes, again." Millie sighed.

"Excuse me?! Don't forget I'm the boss bitch! Hell, before I hired your desperate ass I was going topside daily!"

"Not since you hired me! Mr. I Get To F*** A Goetia Every F***ing Week!" you shot back, Loona quickly covering her mouth to muffle her laughter.

"First off, it's once a month. Secondly, it's a business transaction. And lastly, it's not my fault that bird p*** can't get enough of me. If you think having to hunt down humans is bad enough, I want to see you try to manage Stolas AND run a company at the same time!"

"Oh please, like sitting at your desk jerking off is so hard." you replied, smirking at the shocked expression on his face. While Millie was trying to hold herself back, Loona was laughing hysterically.