Derek was nervous. Since meeting Meredith he had never felt this nervous around her, it had always been natural between them but now things were different and he wasn't sure what was happening between them anymore.
Pushing open the door to their favourite coffee shop and found Meredith sitting at their usual table with two large cups in front of her. He watched as she pulled her sleeves down over her hands before picking at the chocolate muffin in front of her. Deciding not to keep her waiting any longer he moved towards the table.
"Hey Mer." Derek said softly watching as she jumped slightly before turning to smile at him.
"Hey." Her eyes followed him as he pulled the other chair out and took a seat. "I just got you a black coffee, I wasn't sure if you wanted anything to eat but if you some of mine then you can..."
"I'm fine thanks Mer." He smiled at her as he lifted his cup and took a sip before placing down as they just continued to stare at one another but neither of them saying a word.
"Well, this is..."
"Awkward." Meredith finished off for Derek as they both laughed slightly.
"Yeah." Derek sighed before taking a deep breath in. "Look Meredith, I'm sorry."
"Did you know?" Meredith asked as she looked down at her coffee. "I mean when you took this case on did you know that they were suing the hospital I work at?" She watched as Derek nodded her head.
"I know I should have told you but I couldn't. I wasn't even going to take this case, I was going to let someone else take it. But they came to see me, the Millers and I just couldn't turn them away. They were absolutely heartbroken and..."
"You just couldn't say no." Meredith said nodding her head. "You wouldn't be you if had turned them away, it's just who you are. But Derek, did you also know that I was involved?"
Derek allowed his eyes to drop to the table, he just couldn't look at her and watching her break.
"Not at first. But when you came to see me that morning, before the meeting, I knew. They listed off the doctors that they would be talking to and when I saw your name I felt so sick but it was too late for me to get out of it. So when you showed up that morning, I just couldn't...I'm sorry Mer." He said as he finally lifted his head and let their eyes met again.
Meredith knew it was all apart of his job but she never thought there would come a day where they would be against each other.
"Also..." something in Derek's voice made Meredith look up to face and found tears pooling in his eyes. "I spoke to my boss and they said...basically, whilst this case is going ahead we can't be seeing each other."
"So what you are basically saying is that we have to break up?" Meredith asked as she held back as sob as she watched Derek reluctantly nod his head. "Right, I should go..."
Meredith pushed herself up and pulled her jacket tighter around herself.
"Meredith please..." Derek reached out to grab her hand, stopping her.
"Derek, please don't make this harder than it already is." She took his hand in hers and squeezed it softly.
Leaning down, she cupped his cheek in her hand and ran her thumb over it lovingly before moving in to press their lips meet. She allowed them to linger for a bit lip, like she was trying to imprint the feeling of Derek's lips against her in the back of her mind. She never wanted to forget this moment.
"Goodbye Derek." Meredith pulled back and pressed her lips to his forehead before pulling away completely and leaving the coffee shop.
The last thing he wanted to do was end things with Meredith but he didn't have a choice. He had to protect her because if they found out that Derek was dating Meredith then it would cause even more problems.
Deciding not to finish his coffee, he pushed himself up and heading outside. He shoved his hands in his pockets as he slowly made his way home. He couldn't help but wonder where it had all gone wrong, he was meant to be planning a trip of them to go away but now, now he was all alone.
He hadn't even realised where he had walked to until he heard his moms voice fall out to him.
"Ma." He said sadly as he walked up to her and wrapped his arms around her.
"Come in Derek." She guided him inside and directed him to the kitchen. "What happened?"
"Me and Meredith broke up." Derek said as he poured himself a glass of scotch and downed it quickly before pouring himself another glass.
"Why? I mean, you seemed so happy." Carolyn frowned at him with concern before moving to take the scotch out of his hand and placing it back in the cupboard.
"We had to. Trust me, I really didn't want to but we had no choice..." Derek said as she tears pooled in his eyes as he swirled the liquid around his glass. "I just don't know what to do Ma."
"Look Derek." Carolyn stepped closer to Derek. "It might not seem like it right now but it will all work out in the end, you and Meredith...just give it some time. But don't let her get away Derek, I've seen how you look at that girl, it's the same way your father used to look at me." Carolyn watched as Derek nodded his head.
"Can I stay here tonight? I don't want to be alone." Derek admitted, his mom was the only one he would allow to see him this vulnerable.
"Of course, you don't even have to ask, why don't you go and lie down for a bit? I will make you something to eat." Carolyn rubbed her hand up and down his back lovingly.
"Thanks ma." Derek kissed the top of Carolyn's head before heading upstairs.
As he walked through the house, he smiled at the photos that decorated every wall, photos of his sisters families and of his parents. He hoped one day that he would add to the photos, photos of him and Meredith. But for now he just had to take it one day at a time.
***************
Meredith didn't know who to turn to because usually when she was feeling like this she just turn to Derek. But now she couldn't do that and for the first time in months she truly did feel alone.So there she sat in her living room longing to be wrapped in Derek's arms once again.
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Perfect strangers
FanfictionMeredith and Derek met by chance or so they thought. They came into each other's life when they least expected but life has a funny way of telling people what they need before they truly know they needed it. Even if it means bringing someone into th...