The Geek Revolution ✓

51 | accusation

HIDE MY EMOTIONS. CAST A few scrutinising glances behind my shoulder as I walk.

It's become a habit to doubt everything these days. I'm sharing less and less with my friends. Admittedly, I was never very open in the first place, but pushing my feelings down and away has become worryingly easy. I don't even know when it happened. Maybe it has something to do with the inevitable disappointment that will fill their eyes when I reveal I've ended up sympathising with the Monarchs.

With a contrived smile, I greet my friends. Even the walk to the library, to our little table made me paranoid that I was being watched. It's ridiculous; there's nothing condemning five students meeting up, yet the sheer secrecy around our plan now makes me worry that we'll be punished if the Monarchy catches us. Today's agenda has an undertone of darkness. I can see it accumulating in random flashes of anger in Delaney's grey eyes, frustrated sighs escaping from Benjamin's throat. None of us have sat down yet.

Delaney makes herself comfortable in a chair first. She peers at me with her observant eyes. "What happened with Reece last week?"

Under her calculated stare, holding onto a blank face becomes a harder task. My answer is as transparent as possible, without revealing too much of Reece's secret. "He told me what Brittany was using to blackmail him."

They obviously think my answer is not enough. Benjamin pipes up, "What was it?"

My breath catches in my throat, caught on the lump of guilt that has been a part of me for too long. If I don't tell them, who is it I'm betraying? Am I betraying the trust placed in me by Reece and Derek, or the duty I owe to my friends to end the Monarchy as swiftly as possible? "I can't tell you."

"But you wouldn't tell us Derek's, and now you won't tell us about Reece," Benjamin argues.

Even Leah, always the softer side of a knife, has to agree with the rest of them on this one. "What's up with you? I know we planned for you to get close to them, and you've done that brilliantly. But we also planned for you to share the information. Hold up the deal, Sophie."

"I want to tell you, believe me. When I went into this I didn't think they were hiding things that dark. They are, and they trust me."

Benjamin scoffs, "No kidding. We knew that their secrets had to be dark. Do you think Brittany controlled them for years with only a trivial rumour?"

"Of course not. But we can still use the information to our advantage, I'll make sure of it."

Delaney remarks, "You mean, you can still use the information to your advantage. Come on, Sophie. We need to know this."

The crossroads are here, while I am pelted with accusations. Both paths seem wrong. I can't protect the vulnerable sides of these powerful people when they have never protected anyone else, nor can I take them down in such a foul way. My friends are standing with aggressive postures, crossed arms and disapproving frowns. I feel like I've been dragged kicking and screaming into an ultimatum.

"They trusted me," is my single, weak defence.

Delaney reacts immediately, still elegant when frustrated. "They can't be trusted. You know that."

"Just tell us," Benjamin says, trying to maintain his calm. "What makes you think you deserve to know more than we do?"

"Because they told me, not you."

"Sophie," Delaney warns. "Whatever Reece and Derek told you is the only thing that can help us. We can stir as much rebellion as we want, but as long as Brittany has that level of control over them, we can't do anything impactful. You have to tell us."