cigarettes and stars

trace the scars

WARNING: This chapter includes underage drinking, sexual assault, mentions of depression and self harm.

As i got out i looked over to Aria who's jaw was on the floor. Her eyes wandering all over me. But i wasn't gonna lie she looked good. The dress matched her body shape perfectly. I call her name out a few times but she doesn't answer. I-Is she admiring me? I got butterflies in my stomach but brushed it off my saying "Then stop drooling." with a smirk on my face. I could see her turn red but played it off by just saying "Oh fuck off." while flipping me off. I rolled my eyes and smirked as we made on our way in. When we opened a door we could see a bunch of people. People drinking, playing some table games, making out and already getting drunk. As we walked further in i could see the brunette boy that was in the shop earlier with me and Finn. He looked over to Finn and winked. "Go get your man." I whispered to Finn before pushing him towards the brunette. Willow saw Maeve and Lillith and went over to them. Leaving just me and Aria sitting their by a table. "You drink?" I asked her with a raised brow. "Nah." She answered back nervously. I knew it, still the same goody two shoes. I gently smiled and asked "Can you go with to get a drink?" She looks over to me and agrees. We both went to a bar and i asked for some whiskey. I'm pretty lightheaded so i knew i shouldn't drink too much. I took a couple of shots and saw Aria just standing there awkwardly. A few seconds passed and music started playing, i see a few people go out on the dance floor. "May i have this dance?" I ask while sticking my hand out. She rolls her eyes and smiles "Yes you may love." She said as she grabbed my hand. Me went where people where dancing and we both started dancing. When she danced, i could see her short red dress pulling up. It sent shivers through my spine as we danced together. I was already feeling a bit drunk and dizzy so i had to stop. "I have to go to the bathroom." I told her while taking a breathe. "Should i come with you?" She asked me with a worried tone. "Can't get enough of me? No i'll be fine." I said in a sarcastic tone. I see her roll her eyes while smiling. I walked to the bathroom and did what i had to do but when i walked out i could see a girl staring at me. I try to walk past but she stops me. "Hey, what's your name?" She asked with a smirk. I smiled awkwardly "Uhm i'm Ivy look i have to get back." I said while trying to get away. I was feeling dizzy i can't deal with this now. She grabs my wrist "You got a girlfriend?" She asked me. "Uhm yeah.." I said trying to get out of this situation. "If you had one you wouldn't be here alone, c'mon i'm Dara how about we have some fun?" She asked me while tightening her grip around my wrist. "Let me go!" I scream while trying to get off but she would not let me. I was panicking until i heard a voice.

Ivy was taking a while, it's been seven minutes. She's probably fine but i'm gonna check on her incase. As i went to the bathroom i saw her with another girl. The girl seemed to be flirting with her. I felt so jealous, so mad. Is she gonna fucking hook up with her? I was getting so mad until i saw the look on Ivy's face. She seemed uncomfortable and that's how i noticed the girl gripping on her tightly. She looked scared. Then suddenly i hear her scream "Let me go!" She was even panicking. Rage filled my body as i walked over to them. "Let her go." I said in a serious tone. She scoffs "And who are you?" She said while looking at me up and down. "I-I'm her girlfriend." I said to her. I know i said that just to protect her but for some reason it felt nice saying that. "Mhm?" She said while holding on to Ivy. Ivy was drunk, she was crying and trying to get off. "LET HER GO OR I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU." I screamed at her. I saw her eyes widen as she hesitates "Fine here's your slut, she isn't even pretty." The girl said while walking away. I grabbed on to Ivy who was now snickering. "Hey it's okay i'm here." I said trying to comfort her. "Can we please go home?" She asked. I could tell that she was so sick. "Yes we will." I said while carrying her bridal style out of there. We didn't get much stares since everyone was busy but we did get a few. I walked out of the house with her and unlocked my car. I put her in the passenger seat as i sat in the drivers seat. I sent a text to Willow saying that we were leaving and closed my phone. I started the car and i feel Ivy's head laying on my shoulders as she held on to my other hand. I smiled at the image. The drive was about ten minutes. We got to my house and i carried her in the room. I put her down on my bed. I grabbed some makeup wipes and took her makeup off. It was kind of easy since she was barely awake. As i was taking her makeup off we made direct eye contact. She really is beautiful. As i finished taking her makeup off she was mostly awake now. "Thanks.." She said while coughing. "Hey it's all fine." I said while smiling. She returned the gesture and i told her it would be best to take a shower. She agreed and while she was taking a shower i sat down on my bed. I opened up my camera roll to see what photos i had of this night. I found three pictures me and Ivy took that turned out really good. I thought i'd post them since they were so pretty. I tagged her in the photo before posting it. While i was still on my phone i see the bathroom door open and her coming out in a towel. I felt butterflies in my stomach. "You done staring?" She asked me with a raised brow. I rolled my eyes when she asked me for some clothes. I didn't think much of it and just handed her a tank top with shorts. I had already taken my makeup off and changed into some other clothes, waiting for her to get out so i can shower. She got out and went to look in the mirror to brush her hair but then i saw something on her body. She has scars. Mostly on her thighs. I got up and took a closer look. "Who did this to you?" I asked without thinking. She looked to where i was looking and her eyes widen. I see her stare for a few seconds "I did.. i'm sorry." She said while trying to hide them.

When she suddenly asked me about my scars my heart dropped. I didn't know what to say. "I did.. i'm sorry." I said. Why did i say that? I fucked up. I never told anyone about this. I see her eyes fill with tears as she comes closer to me. "I'm sorry.." I kept apologizing. I see her go closer to my thighs as she traced her fingers on one of my scars. With her face full of shock and tears she lifts her shirt up to reveal her upper stomach. And there i saw scars. I saw to where she was looking and the scar she traced her finger on was the same as the one i had. She did this to herself? Why? It hurt me so much knowing she went thru the same i did. "When?" I managed to blurt out. "I wasn't the happiest teenager." She said while crying. But at that point i was also hysterically crying. She pulled me into a hug and sat down on her bed. We were both crying at the fact that the other had to go through the same thing. "We are together now, and like i said ten years ago we go through these things together. And that was in fact what she had said to me ten years ago. "I'm so happy to have you back." I managed to say in the middle of tears. "Me too." She said softly.

And that night when we both went to bed we didn't stay away from eachother. In fact we stayed close, with my head on her chest and her arms around my waist. We slept better than ever.