I Found You - Nathan Sykes Fanfic

Seventeen

A/N: Dedication to the lovely TheDaisyGirl who has given me some great comments! <3

Trying to make my author's notes shorter because I have tendency to not shut up ;)

I began writing a Jack and Finn Harries fan fiction, so if you have some time to kill it'd be awesome if you checked it out ;)

Hasn't been proofread (sorry) and please excuse some of the cliches and crap in this... I probably should re-edit this but I'm so lazy hehe

Enjoy!

Whilst Nathan was away, I’d thought I’d feel particularly alone, but I didn’t. We messaged each other daily – he’d send me photos of himself and the lads and they always brought a smile to my face. I’d spend hours talking and calling him before flicking through his latest pictures and then go to bed happy.

It didn't stop me from going on a nightly walk myself. I liked going strolling out at night myself - it gave me the chance to reflect back on the day or just life in general. Generally, it was a lot quieter as well, giving me a calm atmosphere to engross myself in and stars sparkling soft flecks of light in the smooth, glazed skies.

I didn't even need to try to keep up to date with The Wanted's activities since Cassidy gave us all a daily, if not hourly, update on their activities, with extra additions of whatever One Direction, Lawson, Union J, District 3... a myriad of celebrities' lives being depicted for us.

One evening she gave us an entire lowdown of all her favourite celebrities' relationship statuses. I tensed slightly, but I had nothing to worry about since nobody knew of our relationship outwith the boys and Jayne. She began reeling off various couples, checking her phone at the same time.

"Siva with Nareesha, Tom with Kelsey, Max splitted up with Michelle way back, Jay's single and Nath's reportedly got a girlfriend," she said, before mumbling off an entire screed of other names.

I nearly fainted - Nathan's reportedly got a girlfriend? Since when? Had somebody spilled?

There was absolutely no way I could ask without sounding suspicious so I flipped out my own phone, despite not wanting to be unsociable. I quick Google of his name had brought up several news sites and I scrolled to any mentioning girlfriends. It didn't take very long to see several pictures of him with other girls.

That was normal though, right? I was still such a newbie to the whole dating thing - I mean, just because I hung out with Josh and Richard didn't mean I was cheating on Nathan. Just because he was hanging out with other girls didn't mean he was cheating. But maybe I was being overly-naive?

I stumbled across several suspicious looking pictures with various articles claiming he had girlfriends, all of them pairing him up with different girls. Cassidy suddenly grunted in disgust. I quickly exited my webpage before looking at Cassidy's phone which she was showing to each of us. It was Nathan, looking close with a very pretty girl.

"They're saying that's his new girlfriend - ugh," Cassidy shuddered, shaking her head. "He could do so much better."

I felt like I was being stabbed. I downed the rest of my drink and muttered I was going out for my nightly walk, untangling my earphones. One of The Wanted's songs came on and I quickly clicked out of it - I didn't want to have to think about this at all.

Easier said than done.

I yanked the hood of my jumper over my head and shoved my hands in my pockets, raindrops hitting down to the ground. The weather was obviously reflecting off my own mood. Not that I was complaining - had it been sunny and bright and warm I'd probably have been ironically more depressed.

In a method to distract myself I quietly mumbled the lyrics to the songs that were being played, in time with the rain drumming down and splashes of puddles. Nothing could take my mind off what Cass had said or the pictures I'd seen or the articles I'd read. I'd thought I could trust Nathan - I couldn't tell if I still did or not. Naivety to love was something I was likely to be prone to.

Walking a few metres in front of me were a young couple out on an evening walk together. The girl was leaning into his shoulder and he had his arm round her, holding a large umbrella to shield them both. I pictured Nathan and me on our nightly walks and then began replacing me with all the different girls. Each and every one seemed to suit him far better than I did and my imagination grew, Nathan looking happier with each pairing.

*

My phone vibrated in my pocket. It was the middle of, quite frankly, a very dull lecture on classical music history. I slipped the phone out and read the new text flashing in my face.

Nathan         Are you free sometime today? x

I felt pained realising I was going to have to meet him at some point. And tell him how I honestly felt.

And I couldn’t lie either.

In the most nonchalant way, I sent him a reply and we agreed to meet up for lunch. Very casual, very relaxed, at a little café. Nathan offered to take us out somewhere fancier but I quickly rejected. That would be more painful and harder, for the both of us. It would definitely not be fair on him. To be honest, my plan was to actually not even eat. Make it short and to the point. No point in dragging it out for longer than it needed to be.

Our lecture finished late and even though our professor was still concluding his final points, I began throwing my books into my bag early. Finally, he finished and I leapt out of my seat, abandoning Chloe, and took a light jog up the stairs and out of the auditorium.

I ran until I thought I could see him in the near distant. He turned around once I’d nearly reached him and he lifted his eyes from his phone screen. Those eyes. Filled to the brim with delight and happiness. I already felt dreadful, knowing I was the one who was going to ruin it.

My lips pulled themselves into a strained smile

“Min!” he said, grinning and pulling me into his arms.

Guilt was killing me. I should’ve rehearsed what to say, I thought, scolding myself.

“Shall we go in?” he asked. “It’s way colder here than it is in LA… I’m freezing my arse off!”

I smiled and gulped simultaneously, my eyes inadvertently darting around everywhere. I had no idea how to do this. Not a clue whatsoever.

I think he could tell I was acting shifty. He waved one of his hands in front of my face in a jokey way, still pulling his adorable smirk. “You look rather lost, Min,” he said, laughing, putting his arm round my shoulders to go inside.

I stopped.

I had to. Before I lost the guts to do it.

“Nathan.”

“Yeah?”

I swallowed.

“I… I don’t think I can date you anymore,” I stuttered, internally dying.

His face mirrored my pain with the pinnacle of accuarcy as I desperately tried to push away any feeling of guilt.

I needed to forget now.

I needed to move on.