Garden of Wounds (Panacea Series #1)

Chapter 41

Forty-one.

I want to live my life to the fullest, with no regrets at all... because they were right.

Nasa huli palagi ang pagsisisi.

"So he's my Father?" The curious Archis shifted his gaze to Zavion. Dahan-dahang kumurba sa ngiti ang kan'yang labi at inabot ang kan'yang anak. "Where were you for the past years if you are my real Father?"

Natigilan si Zavion. He was caught off-guard.

"Archis!"

"You left us alone! You left Mama alone!" Nangangailiti siya sa galit. "She was suffering! Where were you that time, huh?"

Nangilid ang luha sa aking mga mata nang marinig ko ang sinabi ng aking anak.

So all this time, they knew about it?

"Archis..." I called him. "I was the one who pushed him away. I was the one who told him to leave me alone."

"Even so! He's not sincere, then! Kasi kung ako, Ma? Hindi ko iiwan 'yong babaeng mahal ko kahit itulak niya ako palayo dahil mahal ko, e..." He gritted his teeth. "Hindi ko siya niligawan para iwan nang gano'n-gano'n lang! Hindi ko siya pinaghirapan para mahantong lang sa gano'n ang lahat!"

Naagaw ni Atharv ang aming atensyon nang malakas niyang ibinagsak ang kubyertos. Nakayuko ito at nakakuyom ang kan'yang kamay.

"You don't get it at all!" His eyes darkened. "Staying isn't the answer that time! Sometimes, you have to end something in order to begin a new one!" He looked up. "You must be happy, Hanniel. Nasagot na ang isa sa mga hiling mo; ang magkaroon ng Papa. What else are you looking for?"

"Don't talk to me as if you had never sworn before that you would never forgive Papa! Nakalimutan mo na ba? Nakalimutan mo na ba ang palihim nating pagpunta sa kuwarto ni Mama para lang makita kung ayos lang ba siya? Kung umiiyak pa rin ba siya? Kung nahihirapan pa rin ba siya?!"

Tear dripped down on my cheek. I don't want my kids to fight because of that. I just want them to accept Zavion because these are all my fault, not his.

"Of course..." Dahan-dahan ngunit mariing wika ni Atharv. "I will never forgive my own Father," he said bitterly and left the breakfast area.

Nag-iwan 'yon ng isang mahabang katahimikan sa hapag. Walang nagsalita matapos umalis ni Atharv. I signaled Kazuo to guide Archis into his room. Tumango ito at marahang kinausap ang aking anak. Sumunod ito sa kan'yang Tito nang 'di nagdadalawang-isip.

My gaze shifted to Zavion who's also looking at me. He smiled at me but his smile is not reaching his eyes. Hinaplos ko ang kan'yang kamay upang pagaanin ang kan'yang loob.

"He was just shocked. Hindi ka rin n'on matitiis," mahinahon kong sambit.

This is hard. Both of my sons are dealing with something. Because of that, I took a leave in my work. The kids were happy about it. I spent time with them, together with Zavion. Hindi 'yon naging madali sa amin noong una. Ilang ang mga bata at 'di pa rin kami kinakausap ngunit kapag bata talaga... hinding-hindi matitiis ang magulang.

Dahil doon, unti-unti nakukuha ni Zavion ang loob ng mga bata.

"Kuya wants to be a doctor, Papa!" Archis spoke cheerfully. "I still don't know my career path. I envy Kuya," he pouted his lips.

Mahina akong natawa. Naaalala ko ang sarili ko sa kan'ya noon.

"You have a long way to go, anak. Everyday, you're learning and you discover something. That will help you to find out what you want to be in the future."