days of december ; paddy holland

𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝘁𝗲𝗻

You woke up the next morning with your eyes puffy and red, your pillow wet from your tears. You had cried yourself to sleep last night, the comments soaking into you; they made you selfconsious to say the least.

There was a light knock on your door, Paddy's voice coming from the other side asking if he could come in. You replied with a quiet 'come in' and the door opened slowly, the redhead boy walking over to you.

"What happened Y/n?" he asked as he sat on the edge of your bed, looking at you with a soft expression.

"What do you mean? Nothing happened, I'm fine" you replied, confused at the boys question.

"Y/n. I heard you last night you don't need to act brave around me. Why were you crying?" he asked as you sighed.

"You know those girls yesterday?" you started, Paddy nodded, "They posted the video of me supposedly lashing out at them, and to put it simply; the comments weren't the nicest" you said.

"Can I see it?" he asked, you grabbed your phone, your lockscreen of you and Paddy lighting up, making the boys heart flutter. You scrolled through your explore page, finally finding the video, you tapped on it before handing it to Paddy.

He scrolled through the comments, glancing at you from time to time. You were fidgeting, a habit you had when you were anxious or nervous. His eyes read through all the comments, anger slowly rising in him, but what came after was sadness.

He could see that you were disturbed, there wasn't the usual glint in your eyes. He turned to look at you, your head hung low, not daring to look at him.

He wished more than everything that he could just kiss your insecurities away, tell you how he truely felt, but that would overstepping a boundary, so he only used his words.

"Y/n you're beautiful ok, ignore the comments love, you know your worth" he reassured you as he rubbed your hand, making you smile, "Thank you" you said quietly.

"Don't mention it. Now, are you coming down for breakfast or are you going to sulk around all day" he smiled, making you laugh,"I'll be down in a minute" you reciprocated the boys smile before he left your room.

____

You were all sat at the dining table having lunch, Sam had cooked his signiture steak pie, which was unbelievebely good. As you were all talking, you heard you phone ring. You excused yourself from the table, grabbing your phone and going into the hallway.

"Hey mum" you said when you held the phone up to your ear.

"Hey sweetie how are you?" your mother asked.

Don't worry her too much, just say you're fine

"I'm fine mum, how are you?" you replied. You heard your mother sigh, worrying you.

"I need to talk to you sweetheart. You might want to sit down" you gulped as you sat down at the bottom of the stairs. You replied with a quiet 'ok' before your mother started talking.

"Your father and I haven't been in the best place at the moment. An argument here, an argument there. We thought we'd be able to overcome everything but unfortunately we haven't, so we've filed a divorce" your words got stuck in your throat as you processed your mothers words.

"What?!" you choked, "It's for the best Y/n" she said, making you scoff.

"It's for the best?! You think so? Did you even think about me when you made that decision? Do you know how hard it has been for me to see my own parents arguing constantly?" by this time your voice had raised quite a bit.

This was going south very quickly

Worry prickled inside Paddy's chest as he heard your voice rising, making him frown as he stood up from the table, excusing himself. He leaned against the wall, so that you wouldn't see him as he listened to you. He had no idea who you were talking too, but you were clearly not liking it.

"I grew up with you and dad shouting at each other, and then you would lash out at me. I was eight mum, I thought I was the reason why you were shouting, but turns out that you two just couldn't figure out your own fucking problems, so you resort to making your daughters life a living hell!" you shouted, your voice cracking as tears surfaced.

Paddy gulped, his eyes widening as he realised you were talking to your mum. Had they physically hurt you, or was it just mentally? His mind was spiralling with the worst thoughts, thoughts of what your childhood must have been like.

"Y/n you know we never meant to" your mother said, making your anger shoot through the roof. You found it unbelievable how she had the nerve to say that they didn't mean to, when they knew exactly what they were doing to you.

It was because of them that you went to school in silence, scared of going home. It was because of them that your teacher recommended a psychologist because you wouldn't talk to anyone.

"You know what mum? Screw you. You raised a really good child, and then you fucked me up" you said before you hung up. You were static for a few seconds before you sat down on the stairs, your head in your hands.

Once Paddy heard everything go silent, he walked into the hallway, startling you slightly.

"You alright, love?" he asked in a small voice, making you bit your lip to prevent yourself from breaking down. You gave him a small nod, giving him a tip-lipped smile before taking a few deep breath. Paddy remained next to you, trying to examine your face for any sign of a certain emotion.

Paddy's lips formed into a pout as he watched you fiddling with your hoodie, your eyes gazing down to your feet. You hummed, grabbing your phone, and held it with trembling hands, which went unnoticed by the boy. He hesitated with his steps, debating if he should say something or give you a hug. Ignoring his thoughts he walked slowly towards you but paused when you let out a whimper, the sound making his heart clench.

You could feel you body betraying because the next thing you did was burst into tears. Gut-wrenching sobs emitted from your throat as you brought both of your hands to your face again. Paddy didn't hesitate this time and dashed over to you, placing his hands on your arms, "Hey, hey, what's wrong love?" he worried, his eyes clouding with concern.

You felt his warm touch and soothing voice, making you cry even more. You fell into his arms and wrapped your arms around his torso, pouring your heart out. The emotions you bottled up and hid came bubbling to the surface, breaking your walls. Paddy placed a hand over your head, caressing your hair as he mumbled sweet nothings into your ears. He rocked you back and forth, planting soft kisses on your head.

"It's okay, it's okay. I've got you" he whispered, making you squeeze him harder afraid he would suddenly disappear. You both stayed like this for a while until you had no tears left. You sniffled, slowly pulling away from his warmth, your flustered eyes gazing down at his chest, not daring to look into his eyes because you knew you would break.

Paddy brushed a few hair strands away from your face, his hand finding its way to your cheeks. He gave you a sad smile, "Wanna tell me what happened?" he asked, his sympathetic gaze piercing through your body, lifting the dark cloud inside your chest.

Your lip trembled and you swallowed another lump forming in your throat, "My parents are getting divorced" you admitted, your voice cracking at the end. You bit her lip, the tears stinging your eyes. You blinked and brought a hand over your mouth, your eyes anywhere but him.

Paddy's eyes softened, a knowing look etched onto his feature as he contemplated his answer. His mouth opened, but closed, leaving him pondering with your reply. His stomach churned along with his heart that was soaring inside his chest. He let out a sigh, looking at your with a smile. Bringing his hand out once again, he pulled you into his chest.

"Sure you're parents aren't the best family you have, but you have so many people that love you, you wouldn't even imagine" he reassured, letting out a small chuckle. You felt the weight on your shoulder cease, his answer bringing you comfort and a reminder that you weren't alone.

You fiddled with the ends of his sweater as you listened to his ranting. Your lips curved upwards, feeling your body relax at his touch. You closed your eyes, hiding your face in his chest. Paddy looked down, his grin widening at your peaceful state. He kissed your forehead.

"Thank you for always being there for me" you mumbled into his chest, making him smile softly.