Short stories of Merhayes

Seeking Comfort Pt. 2 - Meredith & Austin

"So are you married?" Austin asked. Was this the really the first question this teenager asked her. She was shocked because she thought teenagers were supposed to be shy, but not this one. This one was bold and it made he chuckle inside. He was kind of like Hayes being able to ask the difficult questions. It took her back to the first time he asked her about what Deluca meant to her.

"I was married, but he died a couple years ago." She said with a smile. It was also difficult for her to say those words, she will always miss Derek, but she knew that he'd be happy to see her move on and be happy.

Shocked at her response, Austin didn't know what to say. He didn't want to be rude and ask what happened, but he was curious. "Can you tell me your love story with him?" He asked hoping to get some insight on how she was able to move on or trying to figure out how her kids took it.

"Well it is a long story, but I think we have the time." She said, it was reassuring having a new face being aware about her love story with Derek, in a way it made her memory of him alive. She just had to made sure that it was PG for him and didn't want to have Hayes confront her about "why did you tell my lad about sex".

"So, I met him almost 20 years ago, we met while we were at a diner and he came up to me asking if I was alone and I told him yes and after that we just clicked" she was smiling to herself because she didn't want to tell him they met at a bar and had a one night stand. "And then the next day, that's when I realized that we both work at the same hospital. He was an attending Neuro surgeon, which made him my boss and I was just a resident when this hospital used to be called Seattle Grace Mercy West Hospital."

"Oh wow! And what made them change the hospitals name?" He asked unaware of all the trauma he had just caused Meredith to unearth. She wasn't sure what to tell him, but she might as well tell him the truth. "Well, there was a terrible plane crash, and my little sister and my husband's best friend died, and we wanted to commemorate them in the highest honor so we named the hospital Grey-Sloan." She said as she just kept thinking about how much she missed both Lexie and Mark.

"I'm sorry to hear that and I'm sorry if it brought any unwanted memories." He said astonished that Meredith not only had to deal with her husbands death, but with two people she had a special relationship with.

"It's okay, don't worry about it. Honestly it's nice having someone to talk to about all the ones I've lost throughout the years, it keeps their memory alive." She said with a small smile. "But anyways, we got married on a post-it note, and after we just eloped. I didn't want a huge wedding and he understood that. After that, we adopted Zola, my oldest, and then I got pregnant with Bailey, the middle child. Derek never got to meet the youngest, I found out I was pregnant after he died." She said imagining how Derek would've been if he actually got to interact with Ellis.

After hearing this, Austin became pensive. He was trying to figure out how to frame his next question. In a way it made him comfortable that there was someone that understood what he's going through. Being able to connect to someone who lost so much in a short period of time made it seem like he wasn't alone in the world anymore.

"How do you deal with all the pain? How do you move on without feeling guilty?" He asked. "I ask this cause it's hard for me since mum died. I wanna se dad happy but the concept of him moving on and not being with mum is conflicting for me." He said, he felt guilty that his dad wasn't able to be happy because of him but also grateful that his dad was getting all the help he can get for him.

Shocked at the question she was asked, it gave her a sense of relief. Being able to talk one on one with Austin and figuring out what exactly he needs, would help get her and Hayes together eventually.

"When it came to dealing with the death of Derek, my husband. I ran away to San Diego, in order to just forget what was happening. I came back and had to deal with all these feelings, at the end you just have to move on. The pain is always going to be there but as time passes by, it doesn't hurt as much. Yes, there's moments where I'm like "Derek would've loved to see this of I wish Derek was here" but at the end he knows no matter what. When it comes to moving on, you have to do it when you're ready, losing someone isn't something you're prepared for no matter what. The only thing i know is that they'll want to see you happy no matter who you're with. Being able to say "okay, I got this. I'm able to seek something more because I know that I'm able to love again" is something you need to get too, and patience is key. When it came to Zola and Bailey, it was hard to tell them their dad died, just like how your dad told you guys. It isn't something we want to tell you guys ever, but the love you have for your parent is always going to remain and no one is ever going to replace them, ever. They understand that and your dad knows that too. He puts you guys first and he's a good dad because of that. When it comes to dating, Zola and Bailey are much younger than you, so they don't understand the concept of dating just yet. But all they know is that mom is happy so they're happy. It's okay to feel some type of way, but being able to talk about it will help you a lot." She said looking at him. He took this all in.