I'm Casting Spells

lazy day

Me and Gabby looked at each other and continued to laugh and joke around before she stopped and looked at everyone

"I'm starving" She spoke and I nodded . Lil man stayed hugging onto me. He was still sleepy. And after we ate he'd probably fall back asleep. Alex and Matt went to cook while me and Gabby stayed in the game room

"So did you tell him yet?"

"Not yet, kady I'm scared. What if he doesn't want this?" She looked at her ring on her hand

"If he didn't want this why did he ask you? Also that ring, it's freaking beautiful. I promise you that Alex wants this. Just talk to him about how you feel tonight. Don't try to start a fight, just tell him that your a Lil depressed and want to make sure he's ready for this step."

"Thanks kady, it means a lot. I really do want us to start a family and be together. Also Halloween is coming up on us quick. Next weekend to be exact. Do we have plans? Costumes yet?"

"Mmm I ordered lil man's last night. I will prolly just get mine at Walmart. I don't dress up normally. Plus I haven't been feeling the best."

"I felt that. But how have you not been feeling the best?"

"Gabby you know I'm depressed. But you don't know that I have PTSD. I'm scared. I'm so scared that this is all going to go downhill after the holidays. I will bring him to my family and they'll either like him or hate him then boom he will leave. It happens every time. Every time. And I just can't let it happen this year. This will be more than twice this kinda shits happened and I really do love him. Like alot. And baby boy has adjusted so nicely. Like I don't want this to end. Ever. "

I had tears streaming down my face. I mean it was the truth. People left us. And I hated it. I hated that they left. I felt like it was my fault. I was just being used. I wanted things to change.  I looked over and lil man was asleep. Gabby looked at me and picked him up

"Shh, let's go lay him down and get you cleaned up."

About that time the guys walked in, I tried to just follow Gabby to put baby boy down but heard a plate shatter, I didn't want to look up. I was scared. This was it. I know what's coming.

"Baby.... "

I didn't look up I just pushed past them and went to our room and locked myself in. I couldn't do this. I don't want this right now. I know the bad is coming. I just feel it.

"Baby please let me in. What's wrong please talk to me" he was knocking frantically.

"Please let me know your okay please. " He was begging.

"Please...." I heard him about to cry?

"Kady. Remember what you told me, your minds making things up. Don't do this to him." Gabby spoke. Then realization hit me. And I just stared at the door in shock. What was wrong with me. I sunk to the floor and pulled my knees to my chest. That's when the door unlocked and Gabby peaked In.

"Oh, kady..." She just held me

"I-i don't know what happened. I-i just looked at the door and, and, and"

"And then real life came? It's okay I understand. But I promise you, it's okay. He was freaking out because he seen you crying. He wasn't going to hurt you. That's not what was happening. I promise" she just held me and to keep me. And I cried. I felt numb. Why did I have to have a moment like this? I hated it.

"K-kady?" Matt was in here now and I couldn't really hear anything but my name at this point.

"Kady it's okay" Gabby.