Sincerely, Sinclair || Sinclair Bryant x Reader ||

Chapter 22: Approval

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"Well, it was bound to happen. It's not THAT big of a city."

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The feeling that I felt when Sinclair uttered those words to me was unlike anything I had ever felt. It was this blend of dread, jealousy, and worry that created a cocktail of emotions that was a bitter swallow. Natalie looked the same as she did in the photo I had seen of her. She was blonde, although her hair had grown out since that one photo had been taken. She was average height, she had a lean frame, and (as I said before) she really was a pretty woman.

In the time that I had known Sinclair, this was the first time that I had witnessed him knocked into silence. He looked positively ghostly as his line of sight rotated from his plate in front of him and then back to his ex-wife standing on the other side of the diner. I could tell he was uncomfortable, and he didn't want to be anywhere near her. In the last few days, Sinclair had seen and heard more of his former lover than he had in the entire last year. 

My back was towards Natalie, so I couldn't exactly remain turned around to take another glance at her. I did notice the man standing next to her, and I was fairly sure I knew who it was.

"Is that, uh...her brother with her?" I asked Sinclair, keeping my voice low as I spoke.

He nodded slowly, his face clearly pained and uncomfortable. Sinclair and I had only discussed the Natalie situation once or twice. Sinclair didn't mind talking about it, but I could tell that he'd prefer not to. If it were me, I'm not sure I'd want to discuss it either. 

Natalie and her brother were standing at the counter, not exactly hand in hand, but they were standing extremely close to one another. On the outside, it didn't appear abnormal. But with knowing what I knew, it made me feel unwell.

"I wasn't sure if she and Richard still saw one another," Sinclair whispered to me, "I suppose that answers my question."

Sinclair continued to peer over my shoulder. The look of disbelief and horror written all over his face. I briefly thought about Audrey and David. I knew that they'd be having a field day if they had been here right now. I knew Audrey's feelings about Natalie, and something told me that David harbored those same feelings.

"It's just odd. Our paths haven't crossed in a year, and now I've both heard from her and seen her within a few days," Sinclair chewed his bottom lip in thought, "I don't know. It's just suspiciously coincidental."

"Well, it was bound to happen. It's not THAT big of a city." I said, trying to appear nonchalant for fear of getting Sinclair more upset. Sinclair was now steadily looking at her, digesting the situation and clearly reflecting on seeing them together. 

I didn't like how defensive I felt. This was another reminder that I needed to work on my insecurity. I didn't have any reason to feel like I had to protect or defend myself. Sinclair had told me time and time again that he cared about me. He had told me over and over that he wasn't hung up over Natalie anymore. He had accepted the situation and moved on from it over the last year. 

So why was I so bothered by this?

Sinclair tried to ignore her. He really did try to be oblivious to the fact that he ex-wife of almost a year was standing not far from him. He tried to pick up on our previous conversation about going to France and all of the things that we could potentially do. He was listening to me and soaking in every word, but I could sense that he was using extra focus to keep his attention on me. As in tune with the conversation as he seemed, I could practically see Natalie bouncing around in the back of his head. 

I wondered what Sinclair would've done if I hadn't been there. Would he have gotten up to greet her? Would he have invited them to sit with him in his company? I felt like he wasn't doing what he wanted to do for the sake of my feelings. I didn't like that. I didn't like the thought of Sinclair going out of his way to protect my self-esteem. I appreciated it, but it wasn't fair to him. He didn't have to do that for me.