Its literally some rage am keeping inside that I don't want to throw on anyone
Trying to talk and let someone know how this shit is pissing me off but they both are quite busy these days
I am just crazy.. Am just mad
Holding a million thoughts inside
Scared of them leaking out to everyone as am just a topic of laugh for them now
I literally have lost my mind and just want to punch the wall so hard that my knuckles start to bleed
Someone just broke me down into pieces and treats me like shit but someday when they need something they just act like I mean something to them
Someone telling me about my character
Someone telling me they can break my face like I am just a piece of shit and I will sit and let it happen
Someone i just care a lot for but then also treat me like i dont exist
Someone just left me for a stupid reason and made me loose all the trust in everyone
Someone just idk
Everyone idk is fking this shit up
And am about to loose my mind
Am craving for someone drinks to make me numb..
Some hits on my arms to make it bleed so I can divert myself
Someone to just sit and listen to me.. Whom I can trust and again they will betray it and I will be a topic of other's fkin laughter
Like wth haven't I hv been there with you? Hvnt I tried my best to not hurt you?
Hvnt I done those little things to make you happy?
How the hell will I hold all this inside?
I need a fkin psychiatrist
Cus no one is fkin there to hold my hand and tell me it will get better.. Even if it dont.. Please console me for some fkin seconds..
Cus am giving up.. Am tired of telling my parents that am alright and doing fine here
Amd tired of everything.. I just want relief.. I wanna swallow some fkin pills just to sleep and dont wanna get up until its over..
I struggle to breathe among them
Please this ocd and anxiety issues are fkin getting over my head..
Don't make this hard for me
I wanna rest now..
