A Catboy's First and Only Love: A Kyohru Fanfiction

Hikari Reveals Past Suffering

Hikari Anaishia/Sohma: Being named the guardian of the original promise was not worth all this pain, agony, and suffering I've caused the Sohmas by casting the zodiac spell on them in the first place. Just look Momiji's corner of the family. He's the first ever mixed-blooded member of the zodiac, which I was proud about at first until his own foreigner mother rejected him in both body and in soul. It was just too horrid to watch. It was even worse when it became painfully clear that the only way that woman actually could get her strength and her will to live back at all was if she forgot that she ever bore a son like Momiji, at all.

Kyo was shocked that this was the reaction of Momiji's mother and not his own. Why did she throw herself in front of a moving train instead of killing him in her place, or even just asking Hatori to have all of her memories of ever being his mom erased like the little rabbit brat's mother did?

Hikari Anaishia/Sohma (continued): And, Rin! Poor, dear Rin! Her parents were very loving and kind, at first. But, when Rin asked them if they were really always so happy thanks to the manipulations of Akito's horrible mother, Ren, Rin's parents revealed their affections for their daughter to be nothing but an act. The revelation led them to severely abuse her, both verbally and emotionally, to no end for the next three to four years. That was when poor Rin was finally noticed and taken to the hospital. When she woke up in that hospital, she tried so hard to get out so that she could go back to her parents before they ever found out. But, her mother and father came to her briefly just to abandon her and tell her she wasn't welcome in their house, anymore.

Rin lives with Kagura and her own mother nowadays, but she still can't find it in her to form any meaningful familial bonds with them. Rin continues to wonder what she did wrong in her youth and still lives under the impression that if she could just find that out her parents might one day love her again, like they did before. In reality, though, Rin's only sin, if it ever even were a sin, was being born to parents who just couldn't find it within themselves to love a child with a possessed zodiac spirit, and whose resentment of their own daughter far outweighed their desire to at least pretend to love her. I just really wish that she could realize that truth before it's too late for her to know the truth, at all.

She was also always tortured a lot and hated by Akito simply for only looking like Ren, as though Rin actually has any control over her appearance. I can't stand the way Akito treats women in general or judges Rin by the way she looks. It's pretty obvious that while Ren is no positive role model, even for her own child, and the Sohmas' head maid isn't any better of an influence on Akito's outlook of life.

The way Hikari talked about Isuzu's parents reminded Kyo of his own biological father. It was no wonder that his own adoptive father, Kazuma Sohma, was so quick to open up to Isuzu in the hospital.

Hikari Anaishia/Sohma (continued): Then, there's even Yuki, whose mother saw him as no more than an object, a tool for getting money more specifically. It was all her fault that Yuki has the self-confidence issues that he still seems to have, today. Shizuka was always telling Yuki that she would come back for him later, but it never happened. As a result, Yuki might as well have been sold to Akito by his own mother. The Sohma Family is full of the worst examples of human beings as parents. What was I even thinking when I thought that I could actually leave Japan to travel in this lifetime of the zodiac?

Hikari suddenly broke down into the ugliest tears one might ever see on anyone, clearly regretful that she ever plagued the Sohmas with the curse. She never guessed that her unwittingly taking on the responsibility as the guardian of zodiac, albeit against her own freedom, would cause such misery.

Hikari Anaishia/Sohma (continued): I know I had no right to encourage you to go after a relationship with your first love when I don't even know what Tohruko is actually like, but I wish that you could see yourself the way she and Kazuma seem to see you. I really do, for your sake, not just mine. I know it's hard to feel like you deserve Tohruko, but you have to at least try to fight to hold on to her like you did when you chased the fangirls away from her, today. Isn't it enough for you that you're helping her, yourself? Isn't your simply being close to her now enough to make up for failing to save her mother?