Bad Habits

Mornings are always hard

At 9am, Alex awoke to an empty bed. He huffed but didn't think much of it until he remembered who's apartment he was in. Miles. He stretched out and sighed nervously then he heard the shower running and the sound of music blasting. The song Alex heard was familiar. Why? Then he heard some of the lyrics:
And I want more than I can get
Just trying to, trying to, trying to forget
Was Miles really playing Echo and the Bunnymen at this time? Alex got out of bed to get breakfast ready then he noticed his slip of paper was gone.

Miles was busy in the shower, he had covered his full body mirror and had put comfort music on. Echo and the Bunnymen reminded him of his home. As he washed himself to take away the sweaty smells that lingered on him he looked over old scars that were on his arms and chest. He couldn't stand them. He had to be brave. He picked up his razor and slashed at his arm causing blood to pour down. He felt at ease. No need to be brave. He didn't feel like he should be loved. He was hideous. Then he heard Alex knock at the door. "Yes?" Miles called out anxiously. Shit! He hasn't even covered the shower door. "Can I come in Miles? I have a mug of coffee for you." Alex asked, Miles whimpered anxiously and Alex wondered what was bothering his friend. "No no I'm nearly done. Just put it on the table next to my medication." Miles smiled nervously. Alex saw the box of medication and went to put the mug next to it. Giving Miles a moment peace.

After 30 minutes Miles stepped out the shower and dried himself off. He stained his towel with blood and he cursed silently for doing that. He covered his body in a baggy short sleeved shirt and boxers and stepped out the bathroom, absent minded again. Alex was in the kitchen making breakfast and Alex saw his scars. Miles gulped and ran into his bedroom before Alex could say anything. "Mi, don't hide I still love you no matter what." Alex cried out worried for his friend. Miles was hyperventilating and crying. Alex felt his friends fear. Alex just sat by the door hearing Miles's cries, wondering what to do then the sound of beeps to tell him breakfast was ready broke his thoughts.

As Alex plated up the eggs and toast, the bedroom door opened. Miles looked scared, small and quiet. Alex held up his plate of eggs and toast and put it down at his chair. Miles had a baggy hoodie on now. "Sorry Miles." Alex whispered looking up at his friends distraught and scared face. But Miles didn't reply. He just ate his breakfast and took his medication and then went back to his room. Alex sighed before accepting this morning was going to be hard. Not like he's ever had hard mornings before.

*FLASHBACK TO 2011*
Alex was staying at Miles's after a breakup with Alexa. Miles wasn't looking well himself. He was awfully pale and thin. Alex knew he had to keep his friend happy and think hopeful on finding love again.

The night before, Alex had heard Miles puking in his bathroom and it worried him gravely. Alex woke up early to cook them both breakfast. He knew miles liked eggs so he made scrambled eggs and toast. He went up to Miles's room and he saw him shivering and so pale. "Hey Mi, I made you breakfast..." Alex smiled lightly before he saw his friends face. His eyes were baggier than suitcases you'd take on holiday. "Jesus Mi.." Alex mumbled and Miles began eating his breakfast in silence.

Alex watched his friend until he finished and Miles then whispered, "it's nothing for you to worry about." Before he went to get dressed and Alex saw the bruises on his chest and back. "Mi... your back." Alex gasped. Miles looked down and tears fell down his cheeks "Was it James? Your boyfriend?" Alex asked and Miles just nodded as tears fell faster. Alex rushed to his side and held him tight. "It's okay, I'm here now." He whispered. Miles just nodded and embraced him.

-Present Day-
Alex went to Miles's bedroom door and stood and knocked, getting no reply. "Mi...I've been there for you through many of your dark times, you've been there in my dark times. I love you and want to protect you." Alex confessed hoping Miles heard. Miles unlocked his door and embraced Alex. "I'm sorry Alex. I was shocked you actually were there, not in the bedroom." Miles muttered through the hug. Alex shushed him and kissed his forehead. "Don't worry Miles I love you still." Alex whispered and Miles whined softly. "Hush hush...I'm not scared of you." Alex whispered, smiling softly. Miles looked up with anxious eyes before kissing Alex on the lips. Alex took that as a cue to shut up and listen to Miles. "My knight in shining armour, always saying he's there but never enough." Miles whispered, smiling shyly. Alex admitted that was true, yet things would change. Then Miles began to confess his heart.

"The scars are old, sort of. They are from last week. I relapsed badly, I was triggered by the news that you released AM and you looked like you were afraid." Miles started, Alex's eyes widened. "Also James, he had sent me a letter that week wishing I'd die a horrible death. I put it in a locked box incase he ever came back so I could quote everything to him. I didn't do it because of you. I can't control what happens in those moments." Miles explained. Miles's eyes were watering as he finished and Alex hugged him tightly. Miles felt like he was being crushed but welcomed the hug. He needed his best friend after all. "Babe...if you ever feel the urge, you can count on me for a distraction." Alex whispered before kissing his forehead. Miles nodded and inhaled his scent. "Boba milk?" Alex asked before sitting up with much protest from Miles. "Shall we go out to the beach?" Alex asked. Miles's eyes shone for first time in many weeks, he couldn't believe Alex wanted to have an afternoon out with him. "Really??" Miles questioned shocked. Alex nodded and let Miles wrestle him to the ground in a flurry of kisses and tugs. Alex thought to himself,  "Got to treasure these moments before it's too late." Before long Miles was getting up and going to his room to get dressed.

A/N: Hey it's Noodle ere, sorry this took so long to come out. I had a writing block and I'm applying for uni at the moment but want to finish this story. Anyways thank you for being patient!