the diaries of a pubescent boy

finding the solution

I spend a good 5 minutes looking into the mirror, marvelling at the effectiveness of the body wash. Nonetheless, it still burns. This isn't sustainable.

As soon as I'm dressed, I head off to the library. I know what you're thinking, but this is necessary. If I keep using the bloody body wash, my face will melt off into a puddle.

The library is my last resort. Trust me, I don't want to be here either. I head in and the stench of old people slaps me in the face immediately. Did I mention this place is also the elderly activity center?

I hold my breath and walk as fast as I can over to the "Folk remedy" section. There's nothing else I can try. I skim through the titles, and find "Folk remedies for pimples and other nasties" right next to a book about piles.

Slowly I flip open the book. The pages are so yellow you could give to a jeweller and they couldn't tell the difference between it and actual gold.

I stand there flipping through that book which feels like it could disintegrate any second for a good 20 minutes. Finally, I find the answer I'm looking for. Garlic juice? How do you even juice a garlic?

I run back home to google it, only stopping at the supermarket to buy a bag of garlic. This better work.