Elliot

Eight

No one got hurt. That was my first thought. My first hope. Please. No one got hurt.

I opened my eyes, not prepared for what I'm going to see. We were in the middle of the road. The car was slanted, blocking the whole path. I was breathing heavy.

Alvin had his hands gripped on my seat and Tobias'. His eyes widened in pure terror. Tobias was breathing heavily also, leaning on the car seat, his arms extended, his hands gripped tightly at the steering wheel.

"Everyone okay?" Tobias said.

I looked at him. "What the fuck?" I said. "What the fuck, Tobias?"

"I'm... I'm sorry. I was lost."

"You were lost? Lost fucking where?!"

"I don't know. I can't—I can't..."

"Can't what?" I was shouting. I hated being mad. "Can't fucking what, Tobias? For fuck's sake!"

"Elliot, calm down." Alvin said. He reached to hold my shoulder. "No one got hurt. That's what matters."

"I'm sorry." Tobias said once again, in a whisper. My face immediately softened when I saw his hands shaking. He was scared. Not just of what happened, about everything, I think.

What's bothering Tobias Antoine?

The atmosphere was dead. I hated the silence. But Tobias managed to gather himself and we drove to Alvin's house. Before he leaves the car, Tobias apologized again. Alvin said that it was okay. But I'm sure he also was terrified.

And then we were left alone.

Tobias glanced at me. He looked like a kid that just got scolded. "Elliot, I'm sorry," he said. I can't listen to him apologizing over and over.

"We're lucky we didn't hit a pole." I said. I felt bitter.

"I'm sorry," he said once again. "I'm sorry, Elliot. I'm sorry."

I rested my head on my hands. I feel sick and I feel bad. "No," I said. "I'm sorry." I looked at him. "I'm sorry, Tobias. I shouldn't have shouted at you like that. I'm really sorry."

I felt terrible for shouting earlier. I let my anger consume me. I shouldn't have done that. Fuck this anger issues.

He looked like he was gonna cry. And he did.

There's nothing more heartbreaking than seeing him cry. I pulled him close to me. I let his head rest on my shoulders. I hated seeing him cry. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry," he kept saying.

"It's okay. It's okay. We're fine." I said.

His hold gripped tightly on my jacket. He kept sobbing and sobbing and sobbing. It breaks my heart to see him like this. I knew there's something wrong with him. I wanted to ask what is it. But I didn't. If he wanted to tell me, he would.

I let him break down on me instead. I hope he feels safe around my shoulders. I wished for him to be okay, at the same time I wonder what's the reason he's not okay. What's bothering Tobias Antoine?

***

There was a movie playing in the background.

The actor was mumbling words. I couldn't understand what he was saying.

I felt like I'm going to pass out. But I didn't. I wish I did. I wanted to sleep forever. Or just for tonight. A long sleep. That's what I needed.

So I turned off the television and went to my room.

The sheets were cozy and the air was blowing harshly cold. I stared into the ceiling. I heard Tobias' sobs in my ears. Fuck. I shut my eyes closed.

I wonder what's the problem with him. Maybe I don't know him that much. Maybe there's something hidden on him yet that I need to discover. That is if he would let that something be discovered.

A hidden treasure on a treasure.

That's scary.