𝗦𝗖𝗔𝗥𝗟𝗘𝗧 𝗥𝗘𝗗• 𝗦. 𝗞𝗔𝗡𝗚

𝑡 𝑤 𝑒 𝑛 𝑡 𝑦 𝑠 𝑖 𝑥

- promise

[K a n g S a e - b y e o k]

Even when I think the pain is eased or when I think it is gone it always comes back. Stronger, spreads quicker and lingers into the distance. Spreading until every blood vessel and every molecule within my body is filled, overflowing with pain. It doesn't have to be physical to hurt. It doesn't have to leave scars to be seen. It's those that are kept hidden that hurt the most.

Yet even when I know these factors I still ignore the ringing in the back of my head. Everything still goes unseen. Why? Simply because I find the numbing pain more comforting.

"I'll make sure you win." That's what she told me. With such a sweet and subtle voice. Her words dripping from the tip of her tongue smoother then the raw substance of honey. It sounded believable coming from her mouth. But then again I've seen her leave bodies on the ground and waste no attention on them afterwards.

I'm trying hard to block out her sickeningly sweet lies. But it's so hard to when they come from her.

here we both stood, lining in front of the guards as they explain the rules. To be completely honest I'm not even submerged into their pointless explanations, someone's going to die today. And for some reason I'm praying to who's ever up there that it isn't Ryung.

I watch her in silence. The even surface of her skin stained with dirt, light traces of scars mark her face with faintly dotted blood still covering her cheeks.

We walked behind the guard. Hands tucked deep within our pockets until we come to an abrupt stop. The red guard hands us small bags, seemingly make noise once he places it in the centre of our palms.

I can see Ryung's expression and she doesn't crack. She just gazed at her bag further. Playing with the transparent sounds it makes, scrunching it between her fingers.

"There are ten marbles in each pouch. Please check how many there are."

I took the bottom seem of the small pouch and poured the remaining object into my hands. And there was in fact marbles, exactly ten.

"I've never played marbles." She tells me. The shorter girls teeth clench as she presses them down in a paper line cut.

"In this game, use your ten marbles to compete with the partner next to you. The player who takes all the marbles from their partner wins."

That's when it hit me. That wave of angst that exhaust slowly rising, hitting my bones and whipping my tailbone straight. It hurts to know, it hurts even more that it's her I chose to be partners with.

Do you believe you can fall in love with someone within an hour? Maybe minute? Or perhaps a second? I can tell you the exact moment I had instantly fell in love with my Yun Ryung.

F L A S H B A C K

I reached for her hand, the bare touch of it felt warm as her humidity spreads around my own skin quicker then the cold kissing my cheeks throughout the winter sky.

I could feel the creases fold in her hands as the girl gripped into me tighter. Clea tears ran down her waterline. And still she looked ethereal. That substance soon filled those beautiful amber eyes to the brim to the point I no longer couldn't catch a glimpse of the darkened colour.

She looked at me with a sunken smile. Honey lips dripping from each corner, and that ache in my heartstrings seemed to pull tighter in my chest. Veins begging for circulation as the blood flow slows to an immediate stop once my eyes fall onto hers.

I let go, and the feelings seem to fade into a distant memory. Because for this moment, I barely know her. And for this moment I don't trust her. Even though I know I do,

E N D O F F L A S H B A C K

minutes even seconds I was head over heals, knowingly or unknowingly falling into that deep and darkened hole she had somehow netted me through.

And there my heart goes pounding. Breaths knocking my lungs with less oxygen as she stares at me. Almost like she's about to cry and still through all of this she smiles. Not a smile that says she happy or she's sad. A smile of sympathy a smile like she knows that these are the only seconds we have left to savour before that clock downs and one of these pouches will be left emptied.

::::::::::::::::::::

"Sit down for awhile, let's just talk." Ryung rubbed the base of her hand against the staircase. Her head propped through her arms as she rests against my shoulder.

"Did I ever tell you why my favourite colour is scarlet red?" She sounded so soft, gentle almost like glass just as it's about to be broken. "No, but you have time to tell me why." The shorter girl pursed her lips. Licking them back and fourth consistently.

"Because, it's a signature for all feelings. For anger, stress, anxiety, frustration, love. It's an all in one. A beautiful wreck. The colour that could explain me in one word. Scarlet Red, the definition of a beautiful and dirtied.  One that I fit into perfectly." The sorrow and misery in her tone made me sink deeper into the the concrete. You could tell it meant a lot just from the clear and short distance in her words.

"Your telling me this now because..."

"Because, at some point in some way or form you'll see it. And you'll think of it as my own signature. Yun Ryung's colour and no one else's. Can you promise me that?"

"Promise."