"I just---I just need you."
_
While I waited for Mama to come back home from the store, I had started to get exceptionally bored. Any other day that Mama would leave me in the house while she'd leave for work, I would be okay. But, on this particular day, I was not feelin' it. I was hearing strange noises coming from outside. And, although I was used to the frequent sounds, the ones I had been hearing hadn't been the same.
I was standing in front of our decrepit television trying to find something satisfying to watch. Nothing had been playing, which only led me to the kitchen of other desires. I walked to the fridge, but turned back around because I had already known what was stored in that refrigerator, and it wasn't nothing I wanted.
I then went outside to the hallway, and into the lobby. My heart urged me to knock onto Mr. Swisher's door, but I was afraid to do so. I was afraid that he'd look at me differently, that he probably didn't even want to talk to me. I knew shouldn't have cursed at him, and I shouldn't have lied about my knowledge of his soul. In fact, I shouldn't have even allowed my mouth to speak to Courtney's. I mean, It wasn't my intentions to lie, plus I just needed to make a good impression for her.
All while taking a spot upon the lobby's wooden bench, I noticed how there had been no sound whatsoever. No chirping or humming of the birds---no anything. And, if you knew me, then you knew I needed those sounds from those birds to instill in me hope. Hell, with everything that was going on, hope was what I needed.
I mean, the thought of Mama knowing of Courtney never left my mind, and even the fact that she said she didn't have any children. And, let's not forget about the way Mr. Swisher seemed the last I saw him. What was really going on?
While I began to speculate, a few people marched pass me, going in and out of the building. They stared, helplessly, but it didn't phase me until I noticed one particular girl who just wouldn't take her hazel eyes off of me. As she stood over by the doors of the lobby, I couldn't help to wonder how it was a coincidence that the both of us had hazel eyes.
I then got up from the bench and walked over to her direction.
"Look, is there a problem?"
"What? No!" The girl pulled back, frightened.
"Okay," my eyes narrowed. "So then why do you keep on looking at me?"
"I'm new here in this building. My parents, my siblings, and I just moved 'round here last night."
"Okay, and?" I didn't understand her reasoning for that statement—it was rather none of my business.
"I was gonna come speak to you." Her shoulders shrugged. "I mean, maybe we can become like friends or something, yo. But, if you don't want to, then hell, that's fine with me." She turned around, and began walking up the steps. I assumed she had been headed to her apartment. But, she appeared to be too sweet--like non belonging in such a place. What was she doing in this neighborhood?
"Wait a minute," I say. I hadn't had any friends in our community, and I promised myself that I wouldn't make any either. But, shortly after that promise, I realized we were all just alike. Poor. Crack heads. Selling ourselves. And, dangerous. Giving it more thought, Mama and me had been sailing in the same boat as they had been. "I can show you around. Maybe we can become friends, or whatever."
She smiled then made her way back down the steps, and stood next to me. Not surprised at all, we were almost the same height.
I opened the door, then led us outside. I also introduced her to a few of the people who stayed in the same building as we had. Surprisingly, they were nice to her, and hadn't called her a newbie like they called me when Mama and I first moved around.
