Love Last Fall

part 10

Stares followed Lily wherever she went. Whispers coming from groups of witches who thirsted over James, gossiping about how they broke up.

She wasn't sure how they found out, but rumours travelled quickly at schools so huge as Hogwarts. Besides, the fact that James avoided her at all costs made it easy to assume.

"I heard he broke her heart. Poor thing." A girl Lily never seen before laughed with her friends as she walked past them in the corridor.

"Now that he's available, you have every chance Bekks." A dirty blonde haired girl with freckles and a slytherin tie giggled, nudging her friend.

Ignoring them as best as she could muster, Lily walked on through the corridor in lengthy strides. They didn't know about the desperate kisses in empty classrooms she still shared with James nor about the stolen glances when nobody was looking. These girls were insignificant. But still, jealousy was an emotion that was inevitable in the wake of the new circumstances.

A cold breeze touched Lily's face as she made her way outside and into the forest. You'd think she'd cry in her room for decades after what happened over the past few days, but what was done carved her into a cold statue with walls built around her heart.

Her girlfriends and the marauders smoked in a secret spot near the black lake, talking about all the shit going on in their lives regularly. It seemed the only time where they weren't under complete stress.

It turned out Sirius and Remus were on a rocky road in their relationship and there was something seriously wrong with Marlene. Her constant zoning out, weakness, yellow teeth, smeared eyeliner that was washed away by tears and hurt flashed by with many other symptoms of depression that she was too proud to acknowledge.

Mary was overcome with her anxiety and panic attacks that were controlled by news of the war and Dorcas was probably the only one of them who was okay. Or at least could easily hide her worry.

They were all breaking piece by piece. And this was only the beginning of what was yet to come.

"Finally, we thought you'd never come." Marlene said in mock annoyance as Lily dropped her coat, bag and sat besides her, Dorcas, Mary,  Remus on the rocks above the lake.

Trees swirled around them, embracing them in their dark emotionless green. Everything was darker than it was before and it didn't unnerve many people as they grew accustomed to it in their depression.

Remus past her a cigarette that Marlene was already smoking as she stared ahead into the distance with her feet dangling from the rocks, hair blowing in the wind.

"Don't listen to her, Sirius broke her Bowie record." Remus laughed, and Marlene couldn't stop herself from shoving him with a smile.

"It was a damn good record," She smiled a smile that didn't reach her eyes whilst staring sadly into the horizon.

"If it makes you feel any better," began a stumbling Sirius as he plopped down besides Marlene. "It was the one I bought you." The tension between Remus and Sirius was visible to everyone but they did their best to ignore it.

All of them knew this wasn't about the record that Sirius overplayed but something more painful lingering in the silence of Marlene.

Lily couldn't however ignore the brunette boy who also joined them. James looked at her in longing and want to be able to touch her the way he did when they were in private. Express his affection in the company of his dearest friends. She broke the eye contact first, resisting the urge to drown in his eyes.

"I was in the library." Lily took a drag as Remus lit up her cigarette.

"Why do you spend so much of your time in the library Lils? You're overworking yourself." Dorcas asked.